It wasn't you
by Veep
Summary: Sam's past comes back to haunt her just as she and Jack are building the future they've been wanting for so long. There really isn't anything explicit in the story but the mature theme is based on two adults doing what adults do in a new relationship.
1. Chapter 1

It Wasn't You

Chapter 1

Sam was nervous and excited. This was going to be the first time he'd been in the same town since they had decided to give this relationship a try. Three weeks ago as he was preparing to leave for Washington he stopped at her house and told her he was ready. He kissed her good-bye but he was already running late so there wasn't time for anything more than a promise. They had talked every night she was on Earth, as well as a few times in the middle of the day. Tonight he was coming home for a long weekend. He had a meeting at the SGC early Tuesday morning and Monday was a holiday. The military didn't shut down for holidays but Sam and Jack both had Monday off, there were some privileges that went with rank, which meant they had a three-day weekend together.

Sam left work early to go home and change clothes. She didn't want to be in her uniform when she picked him up. She wanted as few reminders of their military ranks as possible standing between them tonight. She was wearing form fitting yoga pants, a tank top, and a long shirt that hugged her in all the right places. She had fixed her hair and make-up too. She had turned the roast and potatoes she had in the crock pot down to warm before she left the house. Sam decided dinner reservations were too iffy since his flight could be delayed and a crock pot meal could wait until he arrived.

As Sam waited in the parking lot at the base for his flight to arrive she played back part of their last phone call in her head.

"So is your plane still scheduled to arrive at six Friday night?"

"Yes."

"I'll meet you and we can get some dinner."

"Since you're taking care of dinner Friday night I'll make us some reservations for Saturday night. We'll do it up right. I'm looking forward to taking you out on a proper date."

"I'm looking forward to seeing you again. Have you told Daniel or Teal'c you are coming to town early?"

"No, I thought this weekend could just be about us."

"I like the sound of that."

She knew his plane had arrived but it seemed to be taking forever for him to exit the base. He had told her to just wait out front because he assumed if she came in someone would see her and start asking her for advice. He didn't want anything to slow down their departure.

He looked good as he walked out the door. He was wearing jeans and a plaid button down shirt. He walked straight to her car and opened the passenger side door.

"Hey good looking, I hope you haven't been waiting too long." He put a duffle bag and a briefcase on the backseat.

"Just a few minutes." She smiled at him as he sat down. He leaned towards her, cupped her face, and gave her a long kiss. Her heart raced. "And that just totally made the wait worth it."

Sam started the car and pulled out of the parking lot. Her house was about twenty minutes away and the ride was just increasing her nerves. It made no sense to be nervous around a man she'd known for so many years yet her body was as tense as violin string. Her right hand drifted over past the emergency brake and she started drawing infinity signs on his leg.

"Shouldn't you have both hands on the wheel?"

"I learned to drive in a stick. My right hand has been bored since I got an automatic."

"Right hand boredom sounds like a disorder."

"If it bothers you I can stop."

"I'm good." In reality she was driving him mad and he loved it. He'd spent days thinking through different scenarios about how this weekend might go and he didn't want to blow it.

"I have a roast cooking at my house but we can go out if you'd rather."

"I like roasts, especially when there are also potatoes."

"There are potatoes and a salad. You need your vegetables."

They managed neutral conversations about Daniel's antics and recent missions the rest of the way to Sam's house. When she pulled up out front she quickly glanced into the backseat. They hadn't talked about where Jack was staying for the weekend but Sam knew what she wanted and decided to make a big play. Sam took a deep breath reached into the backseat and picked up Jack's duffle bag. She didn't make eye contact with him as she walked towards her front door. Jack grinned as she walked away. He grabbed his briefcase and followed her inside.

She dropped his bag beside the bar that separated her kitchen from the living room. She opened the refrigerator door. "Would you like a beer?"

He placed his briefcase beside his bag and walked up behind her. He placed his hands on her hips and lightly pressed his body against her. He growled in her ear, "Later."

She took in a deep ragged breath as she closed the refrigerator door. "Later sounds good." She leaned back against him as his lips found her neck. His hands slid up under the hem of her long shirt. She spun in his arms and kissed him. He pushed her back against the counter as he got his body as close to hers as possible. Her arms moved down from his neck to the buttons on his shirt. His hands moved under her tank top towards the back of her bra. She leaned her head back as he kissed down the edge of her jaw to her neck. He moaned as she pushed her hips against him.

"Sam…"

"Sofa." The one word whispered in his ear nearly sent him over the edge. The sofa was as far as they made it. Twenty minutes later they lay in a heap and their clothes were strewn across the floor.

"I'm glad you have such a large sofa." Sam laughed as Jack's fingers traced a line up her back. "This wasn't exactly how I had planned our first time."

"You had a plan?"

"I did. Several of them and they were all much more romantic than attacking you the minute we walked through the door."

Sam smiled and ran her fingers through his chest hair. "You really thought after nearly a decade of repressed sexual tension we'd be able to take it slow our first time?"

"Well yeah, although I really hadn't thought about it in that context."

"But you had been thinking about it?"

"A lot."

"Me too." He tightened his arms around her. "We'll have plenty of time for romance and lots of foreplay. I plan on spending a long time learning what you do and don't like but for right now I needed exactly what we just did."

"Mmmmm…foreplay and romance. I am a damn lucky man." Jack ran his hands up her naked back.

"But before there is any romance or foreplay we need to eat dinner."

"You also said something about beer."

"There's beer." Sam pushed off of him and stood up. He watched her every move. He couldn't believe Sam Carter was standing beside him naked. She picked up her shirt and put it back on. "Jack?"

His eyes moved from her chest to her eyes. "Dinner and beer. I heard you."

Sam knew he wasn't able to keep his eyes off her legs as she served up dinner. She had purposefully not up on her pants just to taunt him. She loved having this power. She used her foot to rub his leg under the table while they ate.

"I was able to withstand your figure eights on the drive here so I can make it through dinner even if you keep doing that with your foot."

"Infinity signs."

"What?"

"They're infinity signs not figure eights. I would never do something as mundane as a figure eight."

"Figure eights are mundane?"

"To an astrophysicist they are."

"Figure skaters don't think their mundane."

"I never was any good at figure skating." Her big toe was on the back of his calf making infinity symbols. "But I am good at infinity symbols."

"You're also good at roasts. Dinner was great."

"Thank you. Help me clean up and we can get back to talking about romance and foreplay."

Jack grabbed both plates and headed straight for the sink. "Bring me the rest of the dishes and we'll get them into the dishwasher right away."

Sam walked up behind him and ran her hand across his shoulder. "In a hurry?"

Jack moaned as Sam pressed her hips against his rear. "Oh hell yes."

As promised they spent their evening slowly exploring and learning about each other. They even had some time to talk before falling asleep around midnight.

_She saw him come into her lab out of the corner of her eye. He looked back out into the hall and then closed the door. A small alarm bell started to ring in her head but she ignored it. She lifted her head as he walked straight towards her. The alarm in her head was louder now but she didn't react in time. His right fist impacted with the left side of her face. Her left zygomatic arch was broken on impact, as was the orbit around her left eye. Her head bounced off the lab bench, fracturing her right temporal and parietal bones._

_As her head rebounded back up he punched her in the face, knocking out her front four teeth and fracturing her maxilla and ethmoid bones. The impact knocked her off her stool. She hit the floor hard. Her head was swimming and none of this was making any sense. She saw him lifting the stool over his head so she raised her arms to protect herself from the blow. He brought the stool down and broke her right humerus, ulna, and radius as well as her left ulna bone. He tossed the stool aside and picked up a screwdriver from her lab bench. He straddled her body and began thrusting the screwdriver into her. She could see it was a Phillips head screwdriver. Part of her brain was counting the eighteen stab wounds while the rest of her brain was struggling to come up with a way to escape. She lifted her legs to try and dislodge him. He paused, slapped her, and stabbed her a couple more time._

_He tossed the screwdriver and stood up over her. Now that he was off of her she curled into a fetal position. He kicked her, once in the lower back and then at the base of her skull. Her world went dark._


	2. Chapter 2

It Wasn't You

Chapter 2

Sam woke with a start. She was covered in a cold sweat and panting. She reached over and slapped the button on her clock that illuminated the dial. It was 3:08 in the morning.

"Sam, are you ok?" The sound of his voice made her jump. She had forgotten he was here. He rolled over to face her. "Sam?"

"I'm sorry I woke you."

He reached out for her. At first she tensed but then she rolled into his arms and buried her face against his neck. "You're shaking."

"I had a nightmare but I'm fine."

He squeezed her. "We've seen plenty of nightmare level stuff."

She nodded. He kissed her forehead and rubbed her back. She relaxed in his arms as he fell back asleep. She lay there for about an hour trying to stop reliving her nightmare before she also drifted back to sleep.

Sam jerked back awake at 7:36 in the morning, having finished the nightmare again. This time there was just enough light in the room for her to be able to get her bearings. She lay still long enough to get her breathing under control then she slid out of bed and went to the bathroom. When she finished she looked in on Jack, who was still sleeping soundly, before heading to the kitchen to make some coffee. She heated up her frying pan and got out a package of bacon. She was just finishing the bacon and starting some eggs when Jack walked in, wrapped his arms around her, and kissed the back of her neck.

"Good morning, beautiful. Have you been up long?"

"Not really. I expected you to sleep longer."

"No man can resist the smell of bacon cooking." He grabbed a piece of bacon off the paper plate beside the stove and backed up as she swatted at his arm. They enjoyed a breakfast of bacon, eggs, doughnuts, and coffee as they talked about Sam's latest mission. They spent their morning getting some work done, reading through reports and making some notes so they'd be ready for their various meetings on Tuesday.

After lunch Jack turned on a football game and Sam fell asleep while she read. He put his arm around her as her head fell onto his chest. He leaned down and smelled her hair, it smelled fruity and very feminine. The football game was almost over when Sam's head shot up. Her eyes were huge and when she saw him she flinched back.

"Sam?" He let go of her when she flinched backwards. As her breathing slowed and her face relaxed she moved back towards him. She wrapped her arms around his neck and gave him a deep, long kiss. He was surprised by her one hundred and eighty degree turn around but he wasn't stupid enough to stop this kiss. She was smiling when she pulled her head back to look at him. She scooted closer to him, threw one leg over him, and sat facing him on his lap. She bent her head down and kissed him again. His right arm wrapped around her and pulled her closer. His left arm rose up. She cracked open her eyes and saw him looking over her shoulder.

"Did you just check your watch?"

"Ummm…yeah?"

Sam leaned back. "You've been having sex with me for less than twenty four hours and you're already so bored with the prospect of more sex that you're checking your watch?"

"No! No, no, no, no. That isn't it at all." Sam used her index finger to draw a line from the middle of his lower lip, along his chin, down his neck, and between his collar bones. His hips lifted slightly as her finger moved. "I was checking to see if we had enough time to take it up a notch and still get ready for dinner. Our reservations are for 6:30."

Her finger slid under his shirt. "What did you decide?"

His head fell back against the sofa. He gripped her hips and pressed himself against her. "We have two hours to get there. I can shower fast enough. I don't know how long all your girl prepping takes though." Sam pulled away from him and stood up. "Awwwww."

"Men really are crap at multi-tasking." Sam stripped off her shirt as she walked away from him.

"What does that mean? Are we doing this? Should I be following you?"

Sam's hand came out from around the corner. She swung her bra in a circle. "I'm going to go ahead and take my shower."

Jack stood up and rushed to her bedroom. He got there in time to catch a glimpse of naked Sam going into the bathroom. He stripped as fast as possible, leaving his underwear in his pants as he took them both off at once. Sam was turning on the shower when he walked in.

"Glad you decided to join me."

"I have a feeling I'm going to be damn glad I did too."

Sam stepped into the shower and Jack followed. "Ohhhh, this is nice, not exactly a standard issue shower."

"Nope. I did some remodeling a few years ago."

"I like shower heads with flexible arms." Jack took it off the wall and sprayed Sam's back. She jumped when the water hit her.

"Jack!" He laughed.

"You have a seat in here?"

"For shaving." Sam turned another knob and a mist filled the shower.

"Hey, what's that?"

"I can turn off the shower head and stay warm, which saves me money and keeps me comfortable."

Sam took the shower head from Jack and hung it back up on the wall. She stepped under it as Jack sat down on the bench. Once her hair was wet she put shampoo in her hand and lathered her hair. Jack watched her every move. Once her hair was lathered she moved her hand down and put shampoo in the rest of her hair.

"Well that explains it."

Sam rinsed her hair. "What explains what?"

Jack lifted his eyes back to her face. "The fruity smell down there."

Sam laughed. She took the showerhead off the wall and moved over towards him. She got his hair wet and ran her hands through it. He smiled up at her and pulled her closer. They made good use of her shaving seat and even ended up clean before they ran out of hot water.

They were ready to head out the door fifteen minutes before their reservation, just enough time to make it. Jack had made reservations at a posh steakhouse. They each enjoyed a filet and baked potato. Sam got asparagus and Jack got broccoli. They ended the meal by sharing a crème brulee.

They went to a late movie after dinner so by the time they got back to Sam's house they were both fairly tired. They changed for bed and curled up together. They kissed, snuggled, talked, and fell asleep.

It was a few minutes before three when Sam woke. Her heart was racing and she was shaking. She slid out of bed, trying her best to not disturb Jack. She didn't turn on any lights until she got to the kitchen. She poured orange juice into a small tumbler and opened the cabinet over the sink. She pulled down a bottle of vodka and poured a double serving into her glass.


	3. Chapter 3

It Wasn't You

Chapter 3

"Having a little orange juice with your vodka?" She hadn't heard Jack come to the edge of the kitchen.

"I needed something to help me sleep."

"Another nightmare?"

She nodded as she took a sip. "I'm sorry I woke you. Go back to bed and I'll be there in a bit."

He walked up behind her and wrapped his arms around her. He put his chin on her shoulder. "I'm here for the whole package not just the fabulous sex. Talk to me."

She shook her head. "Thanks but talking won't help."

"Don't be like me. Talking can't hurt."

She took another gulp of her drink. "Don't be so sure."

He took the drink out of her hand. "I'm not just going to leave you in here getting drunk."

She scoffed. "It would take more than this for me to get drunk."

"I'm still not going to leave you in here and go back to sleep. Did this nightmare have anything to do with the one last night or the one this afternoon?"

She looked over her shoulder at him. "You knew I had one this afternoon?"

He nodded. "Do you usually have nightmares this often?"

She shook her head. "No. It's been years since I've had this nightmare."

"So it's been the same nightmare each time?"

"Yeah."

"When did it start?"

She reached for her glass but he put his hand over hers and wrapped his fingers through her fingers. "Last night was the first time in years."

"What happens?"

She shook her head. "This won't help."

He whispered in her ear. "What happens?"

She shook her hand free and picked up her glass. She took another gulp of the vodka and he didn't stop her. He was bothered by her need for liquid courage. This was very unlike the Carter he knew. She turned towards him. "Last time this happened I opened up to Daniel and he wouldn't let it go. He and I talk about it until I was blue in the face and it didn't help a damn thing. I meditated with Teal'c. Janet gave me all kinds of drugs to help me sleep but all they did was trap me in the nightmare as it repeated. I even tried biofeedback in the hopes of learning how to redirect my dreams. None of it worked."

Her eyes had gotten bigger and wilder while she talked. Jack's thumb moved in a circle in the small of her back. "But it did stop."

"Eventually, but it was a long five and a half months. Janet was on the verge of taking me off duty."

His eyes narrowed as his head tilted. "I don't remember any of this happening. How did I miss this?"

Sam tensed. She looked away from him. "You were gone for most of it."

"Gone?"

She whispered her answer. "Edora."

"Oh." Jack's lips and jaw tensed but he kept his arms relaxed. "I was only gone for three months though."

"When you came back you went undercover so you weren't really around much and you seemed so different. It didn't feel right to discuss it and not long after your undercover mission ended the nightmare stopped."

"So what happens in this nightmare?" She shook her head and looked down. "Please Sam."

She looked up at the ceiling and took a deep breath. "I'm being attacked."

"Goa'uld?" She shook her head no. "Replicator?" She shook her head no again.

She took the last gulp of her drink and put the empty glass down. "We never found out exactly who it was."

"This is something that really happened?" Sam nodded. She felt his arms tighten and his fists ball up. He pressed his fists against the counter behind her. "You're seeing me trying to kill you, aren't you?" He pushed away from her and turned towards the opposite side of the kitchen. "That's why you looked so scared when you woke and saw me this afternoon, isn't it? Isn't it!"

"It wasn't you."

Jack slapped her kitchen cabinet. "He had my face. The only reason he was able to get the drop on you was because you thought he was me."

"You're wrong. Anyone in a uniform coming through my door was going to get a first shot. He just made that first hit really count." She walked up behind him and put her hand between his shoulders. "I never thought he was you. Not only did he close my door as he walked in, which you wouldn't have done, but he walked right up to me. You always walked to the other side of my lab bench. Even when you leaned over and got close enough that I could feel your breath on my cheek as you whispered that damn lab bench was between us."

His head was hanging down and all the muscles in his back were tense. "If you knew it wasn't me why didn't you defend yourself?"

Sam backed away from him. She had asked herself the same question many times and her answer still sounded weak. "I wasn't exactly expecting trouble. Being in my lab in the SGC is very different than being off world. Even today I don't think I would react fast enough to avoid the first hit."

"Oh bull. Whoever it was knew he'd get closer to you if he looked like me and now every night when you close your eyes you see me killing you."

Sam crossed her arms and leaned back against the counter. "So are you blaming me or yourself?"

"I'm not blaming either of us."

"Really, because it sure seems like you're punishing both of us."

Jack stood up straight and turned back towards Sam. He looked at her with her arms crossed, head hanging down, and bowed back. He moved towards her, "You're right. I'm sorry." He lightly put his arms around her. "Neither of us is to blame but I also don't want seeing me, having me here, to make it worse for you."

"I was scared when I woke up this afternoon because it took me a second to realize I had woken up but once I knew I was awake and you were really beside me, stretched out beside me on my sofa on a Saturday afternoon I was thrilled. We've both wanted this for so long. I don't need some stupid nightmare to ruin this." She put her arms around him. "I love you Jack. I don't want to lose you."

He pulled her close and placed his face against her hair. "I love you too and I'm not going anywhere. I'm sorry I was being an ass. I was just shocked." He took a deep breath. "I hadn't thought about him attacking you in a long time."

"Did you watch the video?"

She felt him nod. "I also saw them wheeling you out of your lab."

"I should have told you a long time ago that I always knew he wasn't you. We just never talked about it and it never seemed like a good time to bring it up."

"I guess now is as good a time as any to talk about it but maybe we can go lay back down and talk. I'm getting a little chilly standing out here in my bare feet and skivvies."

"I do like to keep my house cold at night."

"I've noticed. I figured you were doing it so you'd have an excuse to cuddle up next to me."


	4. Chapter 4

It wasn't you

Chapter 4

They piled the pillows up behind them and climbed into bed. Jack pulled Sam's back against his chest and wrapped his arms around her. She pulled the covers up to her chin.

"So what part of the attack do you see in your nightmare?"

Sam sighed and his arms tightened slightly. "He comes through the door, punches me twice, hits me with the stool, stabs me repeatedly, and finishes by kicking me in the back and neck. That's usually when I wake up."

"Is that all you remember or is that just where the dream ends?"

"I blacked out when he kicked me in the neck but I came to after he had left. I assume he thought I was dead when he left."

"On the video it looked like he heard something."

"Yeah, I saw that. He looked towards the door and then back down at me before he left."

Jack twisted his face down so he could look at her face. "You've seen the video?"

Sam nodded. "Daniel thought it might help."

Jack leaned back against the pillows. "Daniel can be such an idiot."

Sam rubbed his arms. "He was trying to help." Jack scoffed. "When I woke up I was pretty confused. I'm sure it was the severe concussion. I knew I wanted to get off the floor because it was hard but every time I thought about getting up I didn't do it. I had no idea I couldn't physically get up. I saw the blood spreading but I didn't know it was my blood. I don't remember Daniel finding me but he told me about it."

"The goober walked through your blood without realizing you were on the floor because his nose was buried in a book."

"He gets credit for setting off the alarm and calling Janet."

"She got there almost as fast as the MPs. They were holding Danny boy at gun point since he was covered in your blood."

"Months later he was still incredulous about that part. He thinks they should have been able to tell he was innocent."

"He was too green to have been able to do that much damage to you. He was barely staying on his feet when I got there. He puked three times before he had nothing left to puke."

"He never told me that part."

"You looked really bad Sam. I arrived in time to see Janet push the Marines out of the way, throw you on a gurney, jump on top of you to try and slow the bleeding, and have you wheeled out. Those poor MPs never knew what hit them. All she left them was an archeologist covered in blood who was about to blow chunks."

Sam turned her head and snuggled closer to him. "Daniel said you convinced the MPs to let him leave."

"Yeah, I technically took custody of him. I forced him to shower before he could come down to the infirmary to check on you. Daniel, Teal'c, and I were waiting outside the infirmary when the MPs came for me."

"They'd reviewed the video."

"Yeah. Daniel threw a major hissy fit."

"And you were perfectly calm?"

He took a deep breath and smelled her hair. "I doubt it could be described that way but once General Hammond made it clear I didn't have a choice but go with them I went along."

"Daniel said they kept you in the brig for two days."

"It would have been longer but once Daniel heard there was a video of the attack and I was on it he insisted on watching it. He's the one who pointed out that the guy in the video never got any blood on him. The stool also bounced off your arms and hit him in the chest. The hologram of me flickered when that happened. It was quick but Daniel slowed down the video and caught it. Once they checked more video recordings they found me in two places at once."

"Weeks later, when I was ready to face it, Daniel and I tried to use the video recordings from across the base to track his movements and see what he looked like when he took off the hologram but we weren't any more successful than the security officers had been."

"How much of your time in the infirmary do you remember?"

"Not much. I remember Janet and Daniel were there. My face hurt but nothing else really hurt."

"Because you were paralyzed from the neck down."

"Well, yeah, right."

"You were very pale and there were so many wires."

Sam twisted around, ran one hand up to his face, and looked into his eyes. "You were there?"

"I was once I got out of the brig."

"I don't remember seeing you."

"I made sure you couldn't see me. I didn't want to scare you since I knew the last time you saw me I was trying to kill you."

"I'm so sorry Jack. I can't imagine how that had to feel."

"You've sat by my bed more than once."

"I've never felt the need to hide though." She lightly kissed his lips. He lifted his hand and wiped the hair off the side of her face. "I remember the look on my Dad's face when he saw me. That was probably when I realized how bad off I really was."

"The inability to feel or move hadn't clued you in?"

"I was very confused. I didn't even know how many days had passed."

"Four. It took us four days to get your Dad there. Janet wasn't sure you were going make it much longer. She had started talking about letting Cassie come say good-bye."

Sam shivered. "I'm glad he got there in time."

Jack put his mouth beside her ear. "So am I." He kissed her cheek and hugged her.

"He healed my face first to stop my pain and fix the concussion. For a few minutes I was aware of my inability to move and feel."

"Then he healed your stab wounds, arms, and finally your back and neck. He said if he healed your neck and back first the shock of so much pain all at once might overload your system and kill you."

"I know Selmac was the one in control but I saw glimpses of my father's pain while he worked on me. He was so tired afterwards he had to have help getting to a room to rest."

"He slept for eighteen hours."

"About the same amount of time Janet made me stay in the infirmary, even though I was healed."

"You can't really blame her after how close you'd come to dying."

"As soon as General Hammond came to see me I told him it wasn't you."

"You told everyone who came into the infirmary that it wasn't me. That was just about the only thing you said. You didn't answer any questions. You just kept saying not O'Neill."

She searched his face again. "If you heard me say that why did you keep hiding? Why did you pull so far from me over the next couple of weeks?" He looked away from her and shrugged. "You were blaming yourself, weren't you?"

His lips tensed as his eyebrows rose and lowered. "It's possible."

"We sure are messed up."

"But at least we're messed up together."

"I think I can sleep again."

"But if you wake up having a nightmare get me up."

"I will. I promise." They slid down under the covers, rearranged the pillows, cuddled up together, and fell asleep.


	5. Chapter 5

It Wasn't You

Chapter 5

Sam woke up and Jack held her, as he'd promised. He hated that she was being tortured in her sleep. He'd never forgotten what she looked like as they wheeled her out of her lab. The sight of Janet sitting on her to try and stem the bleeding and Daniel, covered in Sam's blood, standing midst the destruction left behind in the lab had shaken him to his core. He only watched the video of Sam's attack once. He heard Daniel pointing out all the inconsistencies but all he saw was his own face as Sam was being beaten. He was having a hard time thinking about anything else as he held her. She felt the tension in his arms and torso.

She laid her palm on his chest and felt his heartbeat. "You're thinking about it, aren't you?"

He stared up at the strips of light from the moon on the ceiling. "I hated seeing you like that."

"I'm sorry I'm bringing this all back up."

"It isn't your fault." He kissed her forehead.

"That doesn't make me any less sorry. We were supposed to have a fun relaxing weekend and I've spoiled it."

"You've spoiled nothing. I've enjoyed every moment with you and I'm looking forward to do this again, many, many times again." He put a finger under her chin, lifted her face, and kissed her softly. After about twenty minutes of chatting they fell back asleep. Sam woke a little more than three hours later and Jack was there to hold her again. They weren't up long the second time and they got in a couple more hours of sleep before they got up for good.

It was Memorial Day so everybody was out and about. Sam and Jack got coffee and then went to the grocery store. Sam didn't need much since she was going off world in a couple days. They picked up supplies to make burgers for dinner and bought Sam some breakfast bars and yogurt. The best part of the shopping trip was comparing the brands of foods they usually buy, there were clearly going to be some compromises in their future. Sam unpacked the groceries while Jack watched her, paying attention to where the bread went versus where the cereal bars went. Jack was also paying attention to her hips and the way her legs looked as she reached to the top of the cabinets. When Sam turned around to get the last bag she caught Jack staring at her rear.

"See something you like?"

Jack stepped forward, "Absolutely." He swooped in for a kiss and she happily reciprocated. "So what are our plans for this afternoon?"

"Bowling? A movie? The park?"

"Bowling?"

"I'm open to suggestions."

"I could bowl. Of course there are also other ways we can entertain ourselves." He gave her a wolfish grin as his hand slid to the edge of her rear and cupped it.

Sam giggled and kissed him again. "Bowling it is." They had a fun afternoon bowling and window shopping through downtown. It was relaxing to just be normal together. They went back to Sam's and grilled burgers for dinner. Sam made some fruit salad to go along with the burgers and potato chips. They watched some tv after dinner but the show wasn't more interesting than getting to know each other better.

When the alarm went off on Tuesday morning Jack realized Sam had not woken him all night. He rolled over and put his arm around her as she pulled her hand back from turning off the alarm.

"Good morning gorgeous." He smiled down at her as her eyes focused on his face.

"Good morning."

"It seems you slept through the night." Sam grinned tightly and nodded slightly. When her eyes shifted slightly away from him he knew she was lying. "So, no nightmare last night?"

Sam's grin stayed tight as she looked back up at him. "Nope, I slept like a baby."

Jack pushed up slightly and put a little more distance between them. "It can take years for babies to sleep through the night and I have a bad feeling you really did sleep like a baby but you're lying to me about it." Jack rolled away from Sam, got out of bed, and walked to the bathroom.

Sam closed her eyes and slammed her fist into the mattress. She never should have tried to lie to him. She sat up on the edge of the bed and looked into the bathroom. He was looking at her using the bathroom mirror. She walked into the bathroom and put her hand between his bare shoulder blades.

"I'm sorry Jack. I hoped if you thought I slept all night you wouldn't worry about me when you went back to Washington."

He dropped his head and spit out his toothpaste into the sink. He stood up, turned off the sink, laid down the toothbrush, and turned towards Sam. He leaned against the sink and opened up his arms. Sam walked closer to him. "We're going to have to tell each other lies in the interest of national security. I can accept that, but lying about things that don't involve national security will build walls between us and what I want to do right now is knock down the walls that we've spent all these years building."

Sam put her arms around his neck and looked into his eyes. "I know you're right and I'm sorry." She leaned in and kissed him softly. When she pulled back he was grimacing.

"I love you but your morning breath is wicked. Perhaps we can kiss some more after you brush your teeth."

Sam shook her head, put down her arms, and picked up her toothbrush. She brushed her teeth with exaggerated movements as Jack headed back into the bedroom to start getting dressed. When Sam finished her basic morning bathroom routine she went up to Jack and gave him a long deep morning kiss.

"Better?" She grinned at him.

"Much." He kissed her one more time before she pulled away so she could get dressed. He grinned even wider a she left his arms. They both loaded up on coffee and headed out the door in time to make it to the mountain before their meetings started.

Sam got into the driver's side. "Do you want me to drop you off at your house so you can drive in on your own instead of arriving with me?"

"Nope, I think it's time for us to arrive together."

Sam nodded as the car started. "You're sure?"

"As long as it's ok with you."

Sam pulled onto the main street. "I'm good with it. I'm just surprised you're ready for everyone to start talking."

"Oh, please, people have been talking for years and they aren't going to stop. I'm not saying we need to throw our relationship in people's faces but I also don't want to hide it."

"Daniel will scream like a little girl when he figures it out."

Jack laughed. "Perhaps we can wait until dinner tonight to tell him. I'd hate to miss the girl squeal."

They split up as soon as they got through security. They each had different meetings to attend. Jack sat through three meetings, delivering the briefcase to one of the scientists in the second meeting. The scientist was very happy to get the briefcase and Jack was very uninterested in his enthusiasm. Sam's meetings all dealt with a planet SG-1 was going to visit on Thursday. She'd been over all the data collected by the M.A.L.P. but she still had to sit through other analysts telling her what they found. She could see why this part of the job drove Jack mad for all those years.

Jack found Sam in her lab after his third meeting. "Interested in grabbing some lunch?"

Sam looked over at him, leaning against her lab door. "I was beginning to wonder if you were going to get to eat lunch today."

"There was talk of bringing something to me so the meetings could continue but I insisted on a bit of a break. Luckily it worked. Shall we?" Sam called Daniel and Teal'c who both agreed to meet them in the cafeteria. Their usual table was occupied when they walked in but luckily the occupants were done eating and gone by the time they got through the line. It felt like the old times when they were still a team. Jack picked on Daniel, who caught about half of the jabs. After lunch they each went their own way, Jack returned to his litany of meetings, Sam went back to her lab, Daniel went back to his books, and Teal'c went to teach hand to hand combat to some the newest SGC members.

Jack was at Sam's office at 1700 sharp. He only had to tell her once that it was time to go. They met Daniel and Teal'c at MaGuire's Pub. They shared cheese fries, wings, beers, and stories told in code since they were in public. Jack had only been gone a few weeks but this felt like a major reunion because they hadn't hung out as a team as much after he had became base commander. It was after eleven by the time they headed back to Sam's. They had to be up at four so Jack could catch his early flight. They quickly got ready for bed and hit the sack, with their hands touching under the covers.

Sam woke in a cold sweat just before three. She considered lying still and hiding her nightmare from Jack but she knew he would be angry and if she was being honest she wanted to feel his arms around her. She wanted to be comforted by him. As she rolled over beside him she lifted her leg and laid it over his thigh. Her hand moved across his chest as he started to wake up. She kissed him. His arm curled around her as her hand moved to the waistband of his boxers. He moaned as his brain tried to make sense of the feel of Sam's lips and body. As her fingers slipped under his waistband and her lips nibbled on his neck his brain kicked into gear.

"Sam." She kept working on his neck and moved her lips towards his shoulder. "Sam, stop." She ignored him and her hand moved further so he grabbed her wrist. "Hold on a minute."

Sam stiffened when he grabbed her wrist. She pulled back and started to roll away but he held her tight.

"I'm sorry. I…I just…" He felt three tears fall on his shoulder. He held her even tighter.

"I get it Sam. I just needed a second to catch up." He kissed the top of her head. "Let's do this my way." He put two fingers under her chin and lifted her head so he could kiss her lips. "Turn on the bedside lamp."

Sam hesitated. "Trust me." He kissed her again and then she reached over and turned on the lamp.

Jack sat up and moved down to the end of the bed. "Keep your eyes on me. No matter what, watch me."

Sam nodded. Jack lifted her right leg and began massaging her foot. He slowly moved up to her calf and then her thigh. Just as he got close to where she really wanted him he switched to her left leg. After an excruciatingly long time he moved higher up on the bed and massaged each of her arms, placing them above her head when he was done. As he moved his hands down from her shoulders he circled around her breasts. Her eyes closed and he stopped moving his hands.

When he stopped his caressing she opened her eyes and looked at him. Once he had her attention again he resumed his ministrations. He used his hands and mouth to pleasure her but each time she closed her eyes he slowed his hands and her eyes would open again. Just as Jack was getting into position to finish a shrill high pitched buzzing started. It startled Sam and Jack.

"I guess it's time for us to get up." Jack's head fell on Sam's shoulder as Sam slapped the snooze button on her alarm. "You have nine minutes. No pressure."

Jack lifted his head just enough to whisper in her ear. "We both know I do my best work when I'm under a tight deadline." Sam laughed. "That isn't helping." Jack finished just under the nine minute deadline. They were both laughing as the alarm rang again. Jack rolled off of Sam and she turned the alarm off for good.

Jack pulled her towards him before she could get up. "Now when you think of my face I want you to think of this morning. I want every tingle to be imprinted in your brain and associated with me."

Sam stroked his face. "I will never forget this. It was amazing." Jack gave her a soft slow kiss.

"If we don't get a move on I'm going to miss my flight."

"That would be fine with me."

"Me too but Uncle Sam would be unhappy." They were out the door ten minutes behind schedule, which still gave Jack enough time to catch his flight. He was back in Washington just as everyone was arriving at work. He called Sam in her lab and let her know he had arrived back safe and sound.


	6. Chapter 6

It Wasn't You

Chapter 6

Sam spent the next two days absorbed in preparing for her mission. Jack called every day and she admitted the nightmares were still happening but she told him she was fine. The truth was she missed having him there when she woke. Luckily, her four days off world would give her a chance to sleep uninterrupted since her nightmare never followed her off world. The natives were very friendly so they spent their first day being repeatedly greeted while they explained the purpose of their visit. Sam took the first watch. One of the disadvantages of a three man team is splitting the night three ways instead of four. The night on this planet was only eight hours long but they retired a bit early so each of them took a three hour shift. Teal'c replaced Sam after her three hours. She curled up in her sleeping bag and fell straight to sleep. Daniel was only an hour into his shift when the very excited natives showed up bearing fruit and meats. Neither Sam nor Teal'c were thrilled with their four hours of sleep but they thanked the natives and enjoyed the food they brought.

After four days a weary SG-1 returned having successfully worked out a plan to send a larger exploration team back to the planet in a few weeks. As soon as they finished the debrief Sam took a shower and fell into bed in one of the rooms reserved for officers. When she woke three hours later she slammed her fist into the mattress and screamed into her pillow. She had hoped a few days off planet might break the nightmare cycle.

She called Jack the next morning from her lab. She was surprised when he answered his own office phone.

"General O'Neill's office."

"Colonel Carter calling to let you know I'm home."

"Hey, it's good to hear from you. Was it a good trip?"

"We made new friends."

"New friends can be a good thing. Will you be going back?"

"No, SG-6 gets that's pleasure."

"So when are you coming to see me?"

Sam perked up at the thought of seeing Jack again. "We should plan something."

"How about this weekend? I can have my secretary reserve you a flight."

Sam looked at her calendar. She had more than a week until her next mission. If she left her research would suffer but she didn't have anything that important going on right now and she knew a long distance relationship would require sacrifices. Her pause of thought made him worry a bit. "I can do this weekend."

"Great. Excellent."

His excitement made Sam grin. "I'm looking forward to seeing your apartment."

"I haven't done much with it yet. Maybe you can help me made it more homey."

"I can try."

"We'll go out on Saturday night. I've got a shin dig of some type."

"A shin dig?"

"I'll send you details."

"So why are you answering your own phone?"

"My secretary's granddaughter is sick so she took the morning off. I've been letting most calls go to voicemail but I saw this was a Cheyenne number. I hoped it was you."

"Awwww. That's sweet."

"You could have called me at home last night when you got back."

"It was late your time by the time I finished the debrief. I didn't want to wake you."

"You are always welcome to wake me."

"I was pretty tired too. The natives never left us alone for more than six or seven hours. We were lucky to get four hours of sleep."

"Sorry."

"I'll be fine."

"I'll pamper you this weekend."

"I'm looking forward to it."

"Come in. I'm sorry Sam but my morning appointment is here."

"We'll talk later tonight." Sam got an email with flight information the next morning. Jack's secretary put all the information in the email and attached a copy. Sam printed out the email and put it in her bag. She worked on her current project for a couple hours and then checked on a few of the other scientists working at the SGC, one of her many new responsibilities. She talked to Jack daily and she stayed busy at work so despite being tired because of the nightly nightmares her days passed quickly.

She left after work Friday night and got to Washington a little before ten. Jack was waiting for her when she walked through the exit. "Hey beautiful."

Her bright smile couldn't hide the bags under her eyes. "Hey to you too." They shared a quick kiss.

Jack looked at the duffle she was carrying. "Do we need to go to baggage claim to get your other bag?"

Sam shook her head. "I've got everything I need in here." She tapped her bag.

"You have a formal gown in there?"

Sam tilted her head to the right and squinted her eyes. "No. Why do you think I would have brought a formal gown?"

Jack sucked in a breath. "For the gala tomorrow night."

"A gala? Are you serious?"

"Uuuummm, yeah. I could have sworn we talked about it but it will be ok, we can get you a dress tomorrow."

"Or you can go without me."

"Or we can get you a dress." Jack reached out to take Sam's bag. "Let's get out of here."

Sam kept her bag but took his hand. "I'm all for getting out of here. We can talk about a dress later."

The drive to Jack's apartment took more than forty five minutes, even though the traffic wasn't too bad this late at night. They chatted for the first twenty minutes, and then Sam fell asleep. Jack didn't mind since he knew she needed the sleep and he liked looking over at her, when his driving allowed. Jack nudged Sam awake when they got to his apartment. He grabbed his briefcase and her bag before she had a chance to reach for it.

They took the elevator up to the third floor and entered 3F, Jack's home away from home. "I like what you've done with the place."

"I call it bachelor chic, which is a small step above I took my parent's old furniture and live like I am in college." Jack had a small sofa and two straight back chairs with a table between them in the living room. The small kitchen area, visible from the living room, included a tiny wooden table with two chairs in front of a large window. He didn't have any pictures up on the walls but there were a few framed pictures sitting on the mantle over the fake fireplace. One was of Cassie and another was of SG-1. The third picture was one of her; one she didn't even know existed.

Sam picked up the picture. "Where did you get this?"

Jack moved over behind her. "Your father left it for me."

Sam turned and looked at him. "Really?"

"Yes. He left me a letter and this was included in it. I'm not sure when it was taken."

"A letter?" Sam looked down at the picture. It was fairly recently, probably taken in the last couple of years.

"Yes, mostly guy stuff and a few bits about watching after you."

Sam laughed. "Watching after me. Classic."

"He also gave me his blessing to do this." Jack leaned over and gave her a kiss.

Sam grinned. "Did he now? Is that the real reason you came to see me before you went to Washington?"

He pulled her a little closer. "It was a good nudge to do something I had wanted to do for a long time." They kissed again. "Let's get to bed."

Sam grinned. "I like the sound of that."

"To sleep, that's all."

"I bet I can talk you out of that." Sam ran one hand through his hair as her other hand slid down to his chest.

"Not tonight. We're both tired. We need to sleep."

"We can have fun and then sleep."

"We can sleep and have fun tomorrow."

"I'm not that tired." Sam unbuttoned the top button on Jack's shirt.

"That's why you slept most of the way here?"

"My little nap has revived me."

"Well I'm still exhausted." Jack took a step back, took Sam's hand, and started walking towards the bedroom. "Come on. Let's get to sleep."

Despite Sam's attempts to change his mind Jack held true to his desire to just get to sleep. Sam was out within five minutes of lying down, a sign that Jack was right to insist that they go straight to sleep.

When Jack woke a little before nine the next morning he was pleased to see Sam was still sleeping soundly. He quietly slipped out of bed, went to the restroom, and then headed to the kitchen to make coffee. About thirty minutes later Sam woke refreshed and ready to cash in on Jack's promise from the night before. When she stepped out of the bathroom she smelled coffee and headed out to the kitchen, intent of a big mug of black coffee.

The sight of Jack sitting at the table reading the paper made all thoughts of coffee leave her brain. Jack was wearing a pair of jeans and nothing else. His back was to the window so he could use the light to read. Sam walked to him and bent the newspaper backwards.

Jack looked up as she entered the kitchen. "Good morning beautiful. You slept all night, didn't you?"

"Yep." She took the paper from him, folded it, and laid it on the table. She straddled his lap and sat down. She lifted his reading glasses off his face and placed them on the paper. Jack put his hands on her knees and looked into her eyes. She leaned down and started a long deep kiss that he was happy to join. Twenty minutes later they were both quite satisfied and smiling.

"You are an amazing woman."

"You're not so bad yourself. I mean I came in here for coffee but you were sitting here looking so delectable that I had to have you before I could even think about coffee."

"Delectable?"

"Yep." Sam reached over and picked up Jack's coffee cup. She looked in and saw it contained cream and she assumed he had added sugar also. She preferred her coffee black but she drank two gulps of his anyway.

"Do you always describe your lovers as if they were food?"

"Only the ones I want to eat." Jack's mouth fell open as Sam laughed hysterically. "I'm going to go get a shower." She stood up, took one more gulp of his coffee, and left him sitting stunned in his kitchen. After she finished her shower Jack took one. They were out the door before eleven. Jack headed towards a posh strip mall that included a couple dress shops and more importantly a café. It was a beautiful day so they elected to sit outside. They each ordered a sandwich. While they were eating and chatting a little girl who looked to be about four or five years old walked up to their table.

"Hi. I'm Lizbreth. Who are you?"

Sam smiled at the girl, who had ditched her parents sitting two tables away. "I'm Sam."

Elizabeth looked at Jack. "I'm Jack. Aren't you supposed to stay away from strangers?"

She looked confused for a moment. "But I know you. You're Sam and Jack and I'm Lizbreth."

Sam looked over at the girl's parents. They were so engrossed in an argument they hadn't noticed her absence. "That is some good reasoning. What did you have for lunch?"

"Chicken fingers and fries. I like fries."

"Do you like ketchup?"

Elizabeth smiled. "Oh yeah."

"Do you have any brothers or sisters?" Elizabeth looked over at Jack. "Nope. Mama says I'm enough to handle."

Jack and Sam both laughed. Elizabeth was loving the attention. "Do you have any brovers or sisters?"

Jack shook his head. "I'm afraid not. I suppose I was more than enough to handle too."

Elizabeth looked over at Sam. "I have an older brother." Just as Elizabeth was climbing into the empty chair between Sam and Jack her parents noticed her absence.

"Elizabeth, get back over here." Her father started to stand up. "I am so sorry she bothered you."

Sam smiled, "She's was no bother. She's adorable."

"Adorable and darn precocious."

Elizabeth got back out of the chair. "It was nice to meet you." She turned to her father. "What does that mean daddy?" Sam and Jack both giggled as the girl went back to her parents.

Jack watched Sam watching the little girl as she retreated. "You want one, don't you?"

Sam looked over at Jack and shook her head. "I know it isn't an option anymore."

Jack squinted. "Why not?"

"I'm getting a bit too old."

"You're not even forty yet."

"I'm close. I can see it on the horizon."

Jack reached over and took her fingers in his hand. "Did you and the cop talk about having kids?"

Sam's hand stiffened but Jack held on. "Yeah, we did."

"You had a plan?"

Sam looked away from him and nodded. "We were going to start trying as soon as we were married."

"That would have been about now, right?"

"We'd been thinking about a summer or fall wedding so I guess so."

"But now you're too old?"

Sam pulled her hand away and fidgeted with her napkin. "I guess I just meant…I just assumed you wouldn't…"

"You assumed I wouldn't want to have kids?"

"Yeah." Sam nodded.

"That would have been true a few years ago but not now. I don't want you to give up on that dream because you're with me."

She looked at him, really looked into his eyes, and saw his sincerity. She put her hand back out towards his and he grasped it. "Ok."

"Ok as in?"

"As in I'll think about what you've said."

Jack nodded. "I'd enjoy making a baby with you."

Sam giggled. "I know you would."

They paid their bill and headed to the closest of the two dress shops. Jack was a little overwhelmed with the glitter, feathers, and colors. As Jack spun around taking it all in Sam headed over towards a silver dress that caught her eye. The sales girl made contact with Sam as Jack found a seat. Sam modeled the silver dress, a black dress, and a light blue dress before deciding on the one shoulder silver dress that had first caught her attention. The store had the appropriate undergarments, a strappy pair of silver sandals, and a small clutch that made her outfit for the evening complete.

They stopped at a park and wandered around hand in hand for a while before heading home to get ready for the gala. When Jack saw Sam in the complete outfit he was stunned. The dress fit her well and the overall effect with her hair and make-up took his breath away. He kissed her.

She pulled back. "Don't you go messing up my make-up. It took too long to get all dolled up. I don't want to have to fix anything again."

Jack held his hands up and laughed. "Yes, Ma'am."

"Don't laugh at me. I'm only doing this for you. I'm not exactly a gala kind of girl."

Jack sobered his face. "Our car is waiting. Shall we?" He led her out to a Lincoln town car arranged by the pentagon. They rode in the back and watched the sights of Washington fly past. The gala was a big affair filled with VIPs. Sam made nice with all the brass that came up to talk to Jack. Jack was impressed with her ability to charm all the old men without making their wives angry. When the evening ended and they got into their car Jack pulled Sam close.

"You have a real knack for small talk. I am going to have to make sure you visit on more of these gala weekends."

"You do this a lot?"

"More often than I would like."

"Once is more often than you would like."

Jack smiled. "True but having you along made tonight bearable."

"Only bearable?" She kissed his jaw, leaving an imprint of lipstick.

"I only barely made it through the night because I spent the whole time thinking about taking that dress off of you. The thoughts going through my head were downright inappropriate and I was surrounded by all those old stuff shirts. It was hard on me."

"Awww, poor baby." Sam started tracing infinity signs on Jack's thigh. He sucked in a breath. "What can I do to make your night better?"

"You are one seriously sexy yet slightly evil woman." Sam giggled as Jack untied his bow tie and unbuttoned his top button. They shared a couple kisses but didn't do anything embarrassing with the driver watching.

Jack tipped the driver as Sam went into the lobby and called the elevator. She gave him a seductive grin as the elevator doors closed. He pulled her close and kissed her deeply. The kiss only ended as the doors started opening again. As soon as they entered Jack's apartment Sam reached up and slid Jack's jacket off of his shoulders. She walked to his bedroom and hung his jacket up in the closet. She took his cuff links off and removed all the decorative buttons on his dress shirt. She slowly unbuttoned his shirt and took it off of him. She walked back to the closet and hung it up. When she started to turn back towards him he stopped her. He unzipped her dress, slid it off her one shoulder and lowered it so she could step out of it. He lifted her beautiful gown and moved towards the closet. He looked at the gown with one strap and the hangers. Sam grinned. She took the gown from him, zipped it up, pulled the cloth straps out of the bodice of the dress, and hung the dress up.

"Well now, isn't that clever."

He pulled Sam to him and kissed her. Her arms wrapped around his shoulders and her hands moved through his hair. Jack lifted her and laid her on the bed. He took off her right shoe and then her left shoe. He climbed into bed beside her and rolled her over. He unhooked her strapless bra and began massaging her shoulders and back. They spent an hour caressing each other and enjoying their time alone.

Sam was curled up beside Jack. "I am a lucky man."

"You are?"

"Hell yeah. You're sexy, smart, hot, capable of taking down most men with your bare hands, a great shot, sexy, and a genius. I can't believe I'm in bed with you."

"You said sexy twice."

"I should have said it a few more times. Not only are you totally out of my league but you are amazing in bed."

Sam laced her hands together, placed them on his chest, and put her chin on her hands so she was looking at him. "I'm not at all out of your league. Are you surprised I enjoy sex?"

"I'm not really surprised you like sex, I mean you are having sex with me, but I might be a little surprised that you are so…inventive."

"Inventive?"

"Like that thing you did with your hips this morning. That was amazing."

Sam smiled. "You can thank Jolinar for that trick."

Jack's eyebrows rose. "You have to be kidding."

"Nope, she had a very extensive and varied sex life."

"And y'all discussed it?"

"Sort of. She felt bad for me."

"Why?"

"I hadn't exactly had much of a sex life when she and I met."

"Oh, really?"

Sam pursed her lips. "Really. I dated Ross for three years in college. He was very sweet but neither of us knew much about what we were doing."

"Why did it end?"

"He couldn't understand my interest in the Air Force. He wanted me to pursue a civilian route to being an astronaut."

"I bet your dad loved him."

"They never actually met but my brother thought he was nice. I didn't seriously date anyone else until Jonas."

"Prick."

"Yeah, it took me a little too long to figure that out though." Jack grimaced. "To put it nicely he was only interested in his own pleasure."

"Are you saying that when we first met you hadn't had a…well…you know."

"Not even once."

"Dang."

"I sort of assumed it was me but Jolinar proved that was incorrect."

Jack's eyes got huge. "Are you saying she gave you your first…?"

Sam nodded. "Yep."

"But you were in the mountain the whole time she was in you."

"So?"

"So you were all worked up at work?"

"You slept with Hathor at work. That seems a bit worse."

"There are some memory lanes we shouldn't go down." Jack looked at her for a moment. "Does that mean you have memories of sleeping with Martouf?"

"Of course I do."

"You say that like it was a stupid question."

"Are you saying you had no idea that Martouf and I slept together?"

"I knew you were close but I didn't think you crossed that line."

Sam looked away. "Jolinar's memories were so much more vivid when I was with him and he felt closer to her when he was with me. That drew us together."

Jack looked at her. "Well, alrighty then."

"You're looking at me differently."

"No I'm not."

"We both had active sex lives before we got together."

"I get that."

"But?"

"I feel stupid for not realizing it."

Sam took in a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Janet accused me of going a bit wild after Jolinar. There is some slight possibility her memories might have made me a bit easier to get into bed for a while."

"A bit?"

"I did some exploring. Janet was just overly cautious."

"Was all of this exploring confined to Earth?"

"Mostly."

Jack's brows went up again. "Mostly?"

"If we are really going to have a contest about who has slept with the most aliens I'd like to remind you that you might win the title."

"Touché."

She could feel he was still tense though. "You're really bothered by this, aren't you?"

"I know I shouldn't be but the thought of you with him bugs me."

"That doesn't make sense. I've been having sex with other men the whole time we've known each other. Hell, I was sleeping with other men while I was in love with you. You should feel bad for all of them."

"You were thinking of me while you were sleeping with other men?"

"I was wishing I was dating you while I was going out with other men. It sounds too kinky to say I was fantasizing about you while I was with other men."

"It would be ok with me if you were though."

Sam grinned and shook her head. "You are who I've wanted to be with for years and I don't want to screw it up now that I finally have it. I certainly don't want things I did well before we were together to get between us now."

"It won't. I know I'm being silly. Let's talk about something else, anything else."

"I've been thinking about this afternoon."

"What about this afternoon?"

"Our discussion."

Jack looked confused but then the light dawn on him. "About having a baby."

"Yes."

"I'm glad you've been thinking."

"We haven't been together very long."

"Not like this." He slid his hand down to her bare rear. "But we've been together for years."

Sam slid one hand out from under her chin and laid it across his chest. "True but it seems too soon for us to start trying to have a baby. We haven't even worked out all the kinks in our relationship."

"We'll never really work out all the kinks, that's half the fun."

"Perhaps we should at least be on the same side of the continent."

"Perhaps."

"I thought maybe we could just stop trying to not have a baby."

Jack's brow knitted. "I'm not sure I'm following."

"I could get off my birth control and we could ditch the condoms. We wouldn't be checking my ovulations or trying to schedule our activities but we also wouldn't be stopping things if things happened."

A grin spread across Jack's face. "Are you serious?"

"I wouldn't suggest it if I wasn't."

"I would love to stop trying to not have a baby with you." He rolled her on her back and kissed her deeply.

She slept all night again. The lack of a nightmare made them both happy. They both hoped her time in Washington had broken the nightmare cycle. They spent their Sunday reading the paper and visiting the national mall, the weather was too beautiful to be wasted inside. They picked up a pizza and a movie for their evening. Sam flew out early Monday morning and got back the base about the same time as she usually arrived. Thankfully the jet lag didn't bother her too much since she had gotten more uninterrupted sleep over the weekend than she had been able to get in weeks.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7 – (Sorry for the long delay. It might be a while for the next couple of chapters also.)

"General O'Neill, I'm sorry to interrupt but you have a call on line three."

"I'm assuming it can't wait."

"It's General Landry at the SGC. He said it was important and I should interrupt you."

Jack stood and extended his hand to his guest. "Thank you for meeting with me today. I'm sorry I have to cut things a bit short but I will investigate what you've told me." As soon as the lieutenant left Jack picked up the phone.

"Jack, it's Hank."

"What's up Hank?"

"I'm afraid I'm calling with some bad news. SG-4 didn't come back on time. When we dialed in they told us a group of anti-alien zealots were blocking their access to the gate. The government wasn't having any success breaking through the line and there was a substantiated fear that these zealots were going to try and attack SG-4. I sent SG-12 in to open a path to the gate and if necessary coordinate a rescue. Colonel Carter and Teal'c joined SG-12."

Jack's chest tightened.

"SG-4 made it to the gate as SG-12, Colonel Carter, and Teal'c held back the nuts but as they were retreating someone threw some kind of concussion grenade. Lieutenant Reynolds and Colonel Carter took the brunt of the blow. Teal'c got her back through the gate but I'm afraid she isn't conscious."

Jack took in a slow breath. "Do they know what's wrong with her?"

"They are tending to her now."

"And Reynolds?"

"He was pronounced DOA. Dr. Jackson and Teal'c are with Colonel Carter. I can patch you down to the infirmary if you'd like to speak with them."

"I would. Thanks for calling Hank. I really appreciate it."

"You're welcome Jack."

Jack waited and counted the beeps while he was on hold.

"Jack? It's Daniel."

"How is she?"

"She's been out since the blast. Teal'c carried her through the gate. Her shoulder is dislocated and there are lots of bruises and cuts. They took her to get a CT scan a few minutes ago."

"Have the doctors given you a predicted outcome?"

"No, not yet, but I'm sure she'll be fine. I mean she's Sam. She's always fine."

"Right." Jack covered the mouthpiece on his phone and called out to his secretary. "Book me a flight to Cheyenne, commercial or military. I'll take the first available"

"When will you be returning, sir?"

"I don't know. I'll figure that out after I get there." Jack took his hand off the phone. "Hopefully I'll be there tonight Daniel but worse case I'll be there by tomorrow morning."

"Maybe you should wait for the CT results. You might be coming out for no reason. She could wake up any minute and be fine."

"Even if that happens it won't be a waste of a trip. I'll be able to annoy you in person. Call me if there are any changes."

"I will. See you soon."

Jack's secretary stuck her head in the door. "I can get you a ride on a military transport but you have to be at the base in less than an hour."

Jack pushed his chair back and stood up. He clicked the power off button on his computer. "I can make it."

"I will cancel and move all of you appointments for tomorrow and Monday. Let me know if you will be longer than that."

"I'll call you tomorrow once I get a better idea of my plans."

"I'll be here. Don't worry about anything. There should be a car waiting for you when you get to the front."

"You're great. I really appreciate it."

Jack made it to the base in time for the flight and was in the infirmary a couple hours after nightfall. He'd never liked the infirmary but if he had to be there he would have preferred to be in a bed rather than sitting beside someone else's bed. Having that someone be Sam was the worst possible scenario, especially now that they were officially more. Daniel and Teal'c were both in the infirmary with her when Jack arrived. They had a chair waiting for him.

She was too pale. The white sheet covering her reminded him of the silver gown he had taken off of her only a few nights earlier. Acid rose up in his throat as he sat down beside her and found her hand under the sheet.

"Hey, Sam. Sorry it took me so long to get here." She didn't respond when he held her hand. Jack looked over at Daniel and Teal'c. "Any news from the CT scan?"

Daniel nodded his head. "She has a small brain bleed and a severe concussion. They're keeping an eye on the brain bleed. If it gets much bigger they will have to open her skull to relieve the pressure."

Jack sucked in a deep breath to try and keep himself as calm as possible. He needed to be doing something but there wasn't anything that could be done.

"They got her shoulder put back into alignment or whatever they do for dislocations. They wrapped her arm to her chest so when she wakes up she won't move it."

"No signs of consciousness at all yet?"

"Not really. She cries every few hours but we assume she is in a lot of pain. They'll be doing another CT scan in a few hours."

Jack nodded. "Thanks for getting her back here, Teal'c."

"It was my pleasure O'Neill."

"So what really happened?"

"Lieutenant Reynolds was cornered. Colonel Carter went to help him. One of the anti-alien protestors threw a grenade that exploded between Colonel Carter and Lieutenant Reynolds. Major Talbot and I were able to get them through the gate along with the rest of SG-4 and SG-12."

"But Reynolds didn't make it?"

Teal'c shook his head. "No."

Daniel shook his head. "He wasn't wearing his helmet. Sam was. Doctor Hayes said it probably saved her life."

"I'm glad she was following protocol." Jack couldn't take his eyes off of her pale face. "Now I want her to wake up."

Teal'c put his hand on Jack's shoulder. "She will."

Daniel stood up. "She crying again." He picked up a tissue from the bedside table and wiped her face.

"This happen often?"

"Every few hours. Let me tell the doctor." Daniel stepped out to the hall and called for Dr. Hayes. They came back in together. He took Sam's pulse and checked her chart.

"Let's get her back into the CT and see if we can figure out what is causing her pain and check to be sure her brain bleed hasn't gotten any worse." The doctor brought in a couple of nurses and the room got very busy. They wheeled Sam out of the room and all Jack could do was watch. Jack fidgeted and walked around the room. Daniel convinced him to go get something to eat after about fifteen minutes of pacing. They were back before Sam returned.

"Her brain bleed has not gotten worse, which is good news. Her shoulder looks stable so that shouldn't be causing the periodic pain. I didn't see any other major injuries to explain the crying. Hopefully when she wakes up we'll have a better idea what is going on."

"Wait a minute." Everyone looked at Jack. "This happens every few hours?"

The doctor nodded. "Yes."

"She's been having this nightmare."

"A nightmare?"

Daniel's eyes widened. "You mean the nightmare about the attack, don't you?"

The doctor looked back and forth between the two men. "So she has nightmares on a regular basis?"

Jack shook his head. "It's the same nightmare. It repeats every night, two or three times. It's been plaguing her for about a month."

"Did something start it?"

"We weren't sure what made it start this time. This isn't the first time it has happened."

Daniel jumped in, "She spent about six months dealing with it years ago right after she was attacked and almost killed. The attack should be in her records."

The doctor scrolled through Sam's records until he found the correct records. "I see the records from the attack followed by Dr. Fraiser's notes about Colonel Carter's nightmares. She refers to them as debilitating."

Jacked nodded. "That would be them."

"There are brain scans in here. I will schedule Colonel Carter for another set of scans and compare them to ones Dr. Fraiser put in her records. Maybe that will help us figure out what is causing her pain and if we are lucky it might give us some insight into what is keeping her unconscious."

"Insight would be good."

There was more activity in Sam's room as they got her hooked up to an EEG to monitor her brain waves. Jack watched them spinning around the room in an unchoreographed dance that ended once there were a bunch of wires attached to Sam's head.

"We'll leave these on all night. That should give me plenty of data." The doctor looked around the room. "We are monitoring her constantly but if you notice any changes please call me or one of the nurses."

"Will do." Daniel went to take a nap while Teal'c and Jack watched over Sam. A nurse wheeled in a bed for Jack who reluctantly took a nap. Daniel was back, with doughnuts and coffee, just after daybreak.

"Heard anything yet?" He handed Jack a cup of coffee.

"Nope, the nurse said the doctor would come in after he had a chance to review the scans. No idea when that will be."

"I'm guessing you slept in here."

Jack ran his hand through his hair. "Yeah."

"You too?"

Teal'c nodded.

"I feel bad for leaving."

"We didn't all need to be here and you made up for it with this sludge." Jack lifted his coffee cup.

Sam moaned. All heads turned in her direction. She gagged. Jack grabbed a pail and held it beside her head as she threw up. The movement made her gag and throw up even more.

"It's ok, Sam."

She lay back on the bed as Daniel went out to get a nurse. Two nurses and the doctor came back with Daniel.

"Colonel Carter, it's good to see you awake."

"It doesn't feel good."

"What hurts?"

"There is a nuclear bomb going off in my head. What happened?"

Teal'c stepped forward. "You were close to an incendiary device when it went off."

"Off world, right?"

Teal'c nodded. "That is correct."

"Does it have to be this bright?"

"No." The doctor waved at one of the nurses and she dimmed the lights. "Light sensitivity is common with severe concussions. Don't be surprised if noises bother you too."

"And the nausea?"

"That is also a symptom. I'm afraid your concussion is very severe. You actually have a small brain bleed but the last CT scan showed it was improving."

Sam squinted at him. "Blood in my brain huh? Is that all?"

"That and a dislocated shoulder. I recommend you move it as little as possible for a few days."

Sam nodded her head which brought on a new wave of nausea. The nurse got to her just in time.

"Ok, enough with all this talk. Colonel Carter needs to rest. The less sensory input the better."

"I'm not going anywhere." Jack glared at the doctor.

"If you stay General you will need to be quiet. Noise and light will be very disturbing to the Colonel."

"I've been there. I get it."

"Ok, everyone else out. I'll come back after I've had a chance to review your scans. For now I want you to turn down the lights and try to rest."

"Right." Sam's eyes were closed and her face was tense. Daniel, Teal'c, and both nurses left along with the doctor.

Jack moved her bangs off her head as she tried to relax. Her face stayed tense though. He sat back in the chair and watched her as she struggled to relax. Her face never fully relaxed but she did fall asleep. Jack flipped through a magazine and grew increasingly bored. When the nurse came in to check on Sam he asked for a laptop, which was quickly brought to him. He was catching up on his emails when Sam jerked awake. She screamed and grabbed her head as the movement made her brain explode in pain.

Jack jumped up and put his hand on her back. He helped her lie back down. Her hands stayed on her head and her face was twisted in pain.

"Sam?"

Her eyes were closed and she was panting. "Damn…nightmare…woke me."

"Jeez, you can't even escape it now. I'm sorry." He put his hand on the top of her head, above where she was holding the sides of her head. The doctor entered her room just as she was getting a grip on her pain.

"I've spent hours reviewing your brain scans and I agree with Dr. Fraiser's analysis. Something is exerting these nightmare upon you." He held up images from her scans for them to see but Sam couldn't concentrate on them so she closed her eyes. "This wave here isn't a normal brain wave. I have not found anything to indicate this has been seen in any other brain waves."

Sam grimaced. "Jolinar."

The doctor looked confused so Jack offered him some assistance. "Carter was joined with a Tokra. I think she's suggesting that could have made changes in her brain."

"Dr. Fraiser researched that actually. Jacob Carter allowed Dr. Friaser to do some brain scans but she did not find this wave in his brain. He was only one Tokra so it is possible this is still related to Colonel Carter's experience but Dr. Fraiser felt strongly that wasn't the case and I agree with her."

"So you're saying something from outside Carter's body is creating this nightmare?"

"Yes."

Sam groaned, "What?"

"I don't know. Apparently Dr. Fraiser wandered the mountain looking for something that gave off this wave but she didn't narrow her search down to any one object. I'm not opposed to doing a new search but for now I'd like to find a way to stop this signal from bothering you. I'd like to put you into a deep sedation."

Sam's eyes flew open and she jerked up slightly. She regretted her action immediately. "No!" Jack grabbed her shoulders to help her stay steady. "No sedation."

The doctor let out a slow breath. "I think it would let you rest comfortably."

"No, Janet tried it. I…I get…trapped." Sam was trying hard to concentrate on speaking instead of the pounding in her head.

"I have some sedation methods that weren't available to Dr. Fraiser."

Jack shook his head. "Isn't sedation dangerous when you have a concussion? I mean I thought we were supposed to wake her up every few hours."

The doctor nodded, "I normally wouldn't recommend sedating someone with Colonel Carter's head injury but this wave may be causing damage or at least impairing her ability to heal."

"No." Sam's voice was the strongest either man had heard it since she woke.

The doctor looked from Sam to Jack. "Alright, let me do some more thinking. There must be another way to approach this."

When the doctor stepped out Sam rolled onto her left side. Jack sat down and scooted the chair close so he could see her face. The blinding pain in her head and fear of not being able to escape her nightmare had broken down her usual tight emotional control. Tears were streaming along the bridge of her nose and falling on the pillow.

"Jack."

"I'm here Sam."

"Don't…don't let him…"

"I get it. No sedation. I promise." Jack held the hand that didn't have an IV in it. "You need to rest. Stop worrying about him." Jack played with her hand and then kissed each finger.

About thirty minutes later, just as Sam was beginning to relax, the doctor came rushing back into the room.

"I've got another idea." He was so excited he had forgotten to be quiet. Sam squinted as his voice made her head scream. "Sorry." Jack glared at the man. "I've thought up a totally drug free option. We have a couple rooms that are designed to keep out all radiation, or I guess keep in all radiation depending on what you are doing in the rooms. Anyway, they are being used for research currently but I can request one of them be cleared out for you. Nothing should be able to get to you in there."

Sam looked at Jack. She gave him a slow blink to indicate her agreement. "We'll try it."

The doctor literally bounced on his toes. "Excellent. I'll start making all the requests." He rushed out of the room, excited about his idea.

It took four hours to get one room cleared out and all the necessary equipment set up. Sam had been unable to rest since the doctor left and her head was pounding, the new normal for her.

"We have everything set up but the room is several floors down. I'm afraid the trip will be hard on you since every bump is going to hurt. I'd like to give a slightly larger dose of pain medication to make you more comfortable and hopefully just a bit tired. I promise it won't be enough to knock you out."

Sam agreed. The nurse added medication to her IV line. She felt it kick in within a few minutes.

"General, I suggest you take this chance to get a shower. It is going to take us a while to get Colonel Carter situated and her new room won't feature a typical bathroom. We have added a second bed for you though."

Jack was reluctant to leave Sam but once they had her in the elevator he took the doctor's advice and went to the locker room to get a shower and a set of fresh clothes. When he arrived in Sam's new room he was surprised to see a massive lead door followed by an antechamber and another lead door. The walls were stark thick grey cement, not unlike so many of the walls in the SGC. The large industrial lights were off, since Sam was still very sensitive to bright lights, and small lamps had been placed in the corners of the room to give it a soft glow. Sam was resting when he took his place in the chair beside her bed. She was having a hard time focusing on his face and she had a funny grin on her face. Jack couldn't help but smile at her since she looked a bit drunk.

"Now that you're here General we're ready to close up the doors and see what happens. A nurse will stay in here the whole time since we can't monitor any of the readings from outside the room. There will be a shift change every eight hours. I will accompany the nurses during most of the shift changes so I can talk to Colonel Carter and check the read outs. If you need anything you or the nurses are welcome to leave. You won't be locked in here. Leaving is the only effective way to communicate outside the room I'm afraid so don't worry about opening the doors if you need anything."

Jack played with Sam's fingers. Her eyes were still glassy. "I'm sure we'll be fine."

Sam fell asleep not long after the doors closed behind the doctor. Jack watched her anxiously as she slept. As she reached her fourth hour asleep Jack started to feel good that this idea might have helped. He lay down on the second bed to get a few hours of sleep before the shift change that was coming. The grinding of the doors woke Sam and Jack.

"Good morning to you both. I hope you slept well."

"No nightmare."

Jack and the doctor were pleased. The nurse brought over a laptop with Sam's most recent brain scans. As the doctor looked through them his grin grew. "The suspicious wave is gone."

Sam grinned. "Good."

"So that means this worked, right?" Jack looked up at the doctor as he was flipping through screens on the laptop.

"I think so, yes. A couple more days in here will do your mind a world of good."

"That also means we need to find the source of this wave. Since Carter doesn't get these nightmare in Washington or when she's off world it's a good bet that the source is local."

"Probably. I'll put together a memo about this wave and see if we can locate a source. For now I want you to focus on recovering. I also have some testing I want to do, so I can recommend the appropriate therapy."

"That sounds fine."

"How's your headache?"

"Noticeable but tolerable."

The doctor squinted. "I'm going to translate that to mean you could use a slightly stronger dose of pain medicine." He nodded to the nurse. "Add a half a CC every four hours for now." He looked back at Sam. "I'll cut it back once you seem a bit more comfortable."

The doctor looked over at Jack. "General Landry wanted me to let you know he has reserved an office for your use. He said you'd know it when you see it. It's on floor 21."

"Give him my thanks."

"I think he is hoping to see you himself soon but if I see him first I will be sure to let him know."

Jack just nodded. The doctor took the laptop with Sam's data and left, chatting with the nurse that left with him. Jack and Sam chatted quietly for about an hour until she fell asleep. Jack left to check out his temporary office. He returned more emails than he cared to count and returned numerous phone calls after he was given a list of messages by his secretary. He returned to Sam's room in time to meet the doctor waiting for the first of the two large lead doors to open.

"Good evening General. Did you get a chance to speak with General Landry?"

"I did. I thanked him for the office and for making this space available for Carter. He said you've been keeping him updated on her condition."

"Oh, absolutely." As the second door opened both men peered inside and looked for Sam. She was sitting in bed slightly propped up on a couple pillows. The lights were still dim and her eyes were just opening as they entered.

"Good evening Colonel Carter. I hope you're ready for a few tests."

Jack sat in the chair beside her bed. "She always excelled in school."

"I don't doubt it."

The nurse helped Sam sit on the edge of the bed. "I'm going to start with a few vision tests. I want you to keep your eyes on this pen but not move your head."

"Ok."

The doctor slowly moved the pen to her right and then her left. He moved it up and then down. Her head moved slightly as she tracked the pen.

"Good. Now let's get you out of bed, huh."

With the nurse standing on her left and the doctor on her right Sam shakily stood. Jack stood just to be standing since everyone else was standing. Once Sam had her feet under her the nurse and doctor backed off slightly.

"I want you to walk forward four steps and then stand straight."

Sam looked like a drunk trying to pass a field sobriety test as she walked forward. She swayed as she tried to stand still.

"Excellent. Can you turn around and come back?" Sam took small steps to turn and walked back to the bed. Jack smiled broadly but she seemed displeased.

"Very nice. Good job. Please sit. Rest a minute."

"I can do more."

"I know you can and you will but I want to do some memory tests right now." Sam reluctantly sat back down on the bed. The doctor asked her to remember five words then he asked her a series of questions, which she answered correctly although she paused a bit to consider her answers. He then asked her to tell him the five words. She was able to tell him three of the five, which really made her mad. The doctor assured her she had gone a good job but she was clearly unhappy. He made several notes before he told her she was welcome to get up and move around the room as long as she still spent most of her time resting.

As soon as the doctor left Sam stood up again. Jack moved close to her and waved the nurse off. Sam silently did two laps around the perimeter of the room. Jack never touched her, even when she looked unsteady. Sam leaned against the bed for a moment before climbing back into it. She kept her breathing even but Jack could tell her walk had taken a lot out of her.

"So how was your office?"

"Hank got me all the basics and left off the name plate so I was effectively hidden. Daniel didn't even find me."

"Probably because he was visiting me. Teal'c came by too."

"I'm glad you weren't alone all day."

"I'm never alone." Sam cut her eyes towards the nurse.

"For good reason."

"I can see coming down here to sleep but all day seems excessive."

"As I understand it your brain has some healing to do and these rogue waves make that harder."

Sam crossed her arms and lay back on the pillows. "I guess."

"So what are we having for dinner tonight?" Jack lifted the top of a tray sitting off to the side of the room. "Mmmmm, burgers and fries."

"Daniel brought me jello, pudding, and candy. Teal'c brought fruit."

"That says a lot about both of them doesn't it. So where is this candy?"

"You should eat your burger before your candy."

"Kill joy."

Jack brought Sam a plate and a glass of diet soda then got a plate for himself. They quietly chatted about Teal'c and Daniel's visits as they ate. Sam didn't eat as much as usual but Jack knew better than worry, she wasn't working out as much as usual and she was still dealing with a little nausea. The nurse added more pain medication to Sam's IV just as she was finishing her jello. Her eyes got heavy about twenty minutes later.

Jack watched her sleep for about thirty minutes before he went to visit Daniel who was of course still in his office reading through some kind of ancient book that seemed about to fall apart. After bugging Daniel for about an hour Jack kicked the man out of the mountain and told him to go home and relax. Jack, of course, didn't take his own advice. He headed back down to Sam's room. She was awake when he arrived.

"Hey there. I thought you'd be asleep."

"It was too early to really go to sleep."

"Makes sense. If I had realized I would have hung around longer."

"I was fine."

"Want to go for another stroll?"

"That sounds like a good idea." Sam swung her legs over the side of the bed and planted her feet on the floor. She took a moment before pushing off the bed. Like before, Jack gave her room but stayed just close enough as she did four laps around the room.

"The scenery in here could use something."

Jack snickered. "It is a bit drab but you'll be out of here soon."

"I certainly hope so." They both slept all night, except for the one interruption when the nurse woke Sam after about four hours. Breakfast featured eggs, bacon, and toast. Jack left to get a shower and change clothes. He was back just as the doctor was leaving.

"She took a few laps last night and this morning."

"She showed me. She has been showing steady improvement. I know she's anxious to leave but I'm worried that when she leaves this room the waves will delay her progress. She proposed leaving today and I promised to consider it. I'm headed to my office to see if anyone has found the source of this wave. I told her I would consider her request while I'm gone."

"Give me a call before you come back and I'll be sure to meet you. I want to put an end to these waves and get her home."

"I'll be sure to call you."

Jack stuck his head in and let Sam know he was headed to his temporary office. Sam was getting out of the room for a while so she could get a shower, something she had wanted for two days. They met back up for lunch, which is also when the doctor showed back up.

"I'm glad I found you both here." The doctor looked over at Jack. "I called your office but I didn't get an answer, I guess because you were already here."

"Probably. What did you find out?"

"This room effectively blocks the wave, which does appear to be the source of Colonel Carter's nightmare. All of the labs that have reported back have detected the wave. It seems to be persuasive throughout the mountain. I've taken readings in numerous places and have found it everywhere I've gone and it is always very strong. I'm afraid this method isn't going to help me locate a source though."

Sam reached out for the laptop the doctor was holding. She looked at his scans and handed it back. "Have you talked to Dr. Richardson? She would probably be a great resource."

"I'll do that, right after we run through a few tests." The doctor waved the pen in front of her face, had her walk around, and had her try to stand still.

When he was finished Sam sat back down on the bed. "So, can I go home?"

The doctor glanced from Sam to his laptop and back. "I'd prefer you spend one more day here, if for no other reason than to escape this wave for one more day."

"Has the brain bleed stopped?"

"Yes."

"Have my concussion symptoms improved?"

"Yes, but you're still exhibiting symptoms. Your balance is off and you're still very sensitive to light and noise."

"But I'll be fine at home." She stared at him sternly.

"The nightmare will return."

"I know."

"Your headache will get worse."

"I can handle it."

The doctor looked over at Jack but he wisely chose to stay out of the conversation. The doctor shook his head and sighed. "I have a few stipulations."

Sam smiled. "Let me hear them."

"You have a concussion therapy appointment at 9 am in the morning."

"Therapy?"

"Yes and you'll be going to therapy until you can pass the concussion testing. I'm also going to prescribe you pain pills for your headache and I want you to actually take them."

"Is that all?"

"Not quite. I am also going to give you a prescription for a medication that should help you sleep."

Sam put her hands up and shook them. "No way. Like I said before, sleeping pills trap me in the nightmare."

"This is new. Dr. Fraiser never had you try this one. You'll be able to wake up and you'll get back to sleep quickly. If it doesn't work don't take it again. Those are my three conditions. Do you agree?"

Sam grimaced a bit and looked over at Jack, who was still staying out of the conversation. "Yes, I agree."


	8. Chapter 8

It Wasn't You - Chapter 8

Sam was released just before dinner, it seemed to take forever to get her prescriptions and finish all the required paperwork. They picked up dinner and headed to Sam's house. They had a quiet evening and went to bed early. Sam's nightmare returned but as promised the sleeping pill did let her wake up and get back to sleep quickly.

Jack dropped her off for therapy and headed to his temporary office the next morning. After two hours of therapy Sam was given permission to do light work in her office, as long as it didn't involve reading or looking at a computer screen. That didn't leave her many options so she decided to tinker on a naquada reactor that was sitting on her lab bench. Jack found her at lunch time and dragged her to the cafeteria.

The noise and lights were too much for her so they got sandwiches and fruit and took them back to her lab. Daniel and Teal'c found them there. They chatted as they ate and then left Sam in a dim lab working on the naquada reactor. Jack returned three hours later and convinced her it was time to call it a day, even though it was early. Sam took a short nap while Jack made dinner.

"You can go back to Washington. I'll be fine."

He smiled at her. "I know you will. I'll get a flight back the day after tomorrow. I'd like to spend one more day like this, just us."

"It is nice." She grinned back at him across the small dining table. "Who knew we could be so domestic and cozy?"

"I knew we had no trouble sharing a tent so it isn't too surprising we can share a bed and a bathroom."

"It hasn't been just a bit easier than you expected?"

"Not really, but then again I don't have to remember not to call you sir."

Her eyes twinkled as she slowly shook her head. "That has been much easier than I expected, probably because you've been Jack inside my head for a long time. The hard part was remembering to call you sir."

Jack went back to Washington and Daniel stepped in to drive Sam to therapy in the mornings. She made sure to have a pot of coffee ready each day when he arrived. After a week Sam was cleared to return to work full-time and her therapy was cut to twice a week instead of daily. She was not cleared for gate travel though because she was still experiencing some headaches and although her memory tests were within the normal range they were still not up to her standards. Her reflexes were also still slightly slow. She was anxious to get back into the gym but she wasn't supposed to do anything that involved bouncing around. The nightmares were still occurring nightly but the medication she had been prescribed was helping her get back to sleep quickly when she woke each night. She had not used the room reserved for her deep in the mountain even though the doctor had reminded her more than once that it was available for her.

Jack called her every day but he wasn't able to work out another visit and Sam wasn't cleared to fly yet. It had been almost three weeks since he last saw Sam in person when his phone rang, waking him from a sound sleep.

"Lo?"

"Jack?" Jack gave his head a small shake and pried his eyes open.

"Yes, Daniel. What's up?"

"You sound funny? Were you asleep?"

"Of course I was asleep. It's almost one am."

"No it's not, it's…oh wait…I forgot about the time difference. I'm sorry. I can call you back tomorrow."

"Go ahead Daniel. I'm up now."

"Are you sure?"

"I wouldn't have said it if I didn't mean it."

"Ok, I'm calling to talk about Sam." Jack scooted up against his headboard.

"What about her?"

"I just left her lab a few minutes ago and she is full of energy."

"That's a problem?"

"At this hour it isn't normal. She can't sit still and her attention is all over the place. I've seen this before and that's what has me worried."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"I was afraid of that. I didn't think Janet ever told you."

"Stop beating around the bush Daniel and just tell me what's going on."

"If I tell you what I think is going on are you required to report it?"

"Daniel…"

"I'm serious Jack. I'm calling Sam's boyfriend not her superior officer."

"Boyfriend makes me sound twelve."

"If I tell you something is wrong with Sam are you required to report it?"

"Daniel, I can't let her endanger people, including herself."

"I get that. I'll find another way to go about this."

"No." Jack ran his hand across his face. "I'll keep it between us. Spill."

"You promise?"

"Damn it Daniel."

"Fine, fine. A few years ago Sam went through a rough patch and she started using some prescription medications that weren't exactly Janet approved."

Jack sat up straighter. "Not Carter."

"That's what we all thought at the time too. It started out innocently enough. She was having trouble sleeping and Janet prescribed her some sleeping pills, but they left her groggy and she was dragging so she got a prescription for uppers."

"And she didn't tell Janet?"

"no, she didn't. Sam went to a civilian doctor who didn't know anything about the sleeping pills."

"Damn, no way."

"I know."

"And you think she's using something again?"

"This is what it was like last time. When I watch her work I feel like I've gone back in time."

"She was fine when I left three weeks ago."

"I know. Hopefully I'm wrong."

"Have you talked to Teal'c about this?

"Yes, he suggested I call you."

Jack lay back against the pillows. "Alright, I need to see what you're talking about. I'll come for a visit this weekend."

Jack decided to keep his visit a surprise. He arrived late Friday night and took a taxi to his house. It took a couple cranks to get his truck going so he could drive by Sam's house and confirm it was dark before he headed to the mountain. Jack found Sam in her lab. She was just as Daniel had described. She was on her feet leaning over her work bench. Her right foot was tapping out a tune only she could hear in her head. She flitted from the machine to her laptop and back to the machine. He made it several feet into the room before she heard him. She spun around and for a moment he saw fear on her face. He felt awful for not realizing that sneaking up on her unannounced in her lab would remind her of the attack and her lingering nightmare.

"Hey beautiful, I didn't mean to startle you."

Sam's face lit up with a large smile. "I didn't know you were coming to town!"

"It was a last minute decision so I decided to keep it a surprise."

She stepped towards him with her arms open but then stopped. He knew what was going through her head. Her momentary fluster amused him. She lowered her arms and looked around the lab, glancing at the camera in the corner. They were still both military officers and they shouldn't be flaunting their relationship on base, especially not where there are cameras.

"It's pretty late. Can you leave your gadgets?" Jack pointed at the stuff on her lab bench.

Sam looked over her shoulder. He saw her hesitation. "This can wait." She turned back towards him and smiled again. "Let me change clothes real quick and we can go."

Jack patiently waited outside the locker room until she emerged wearing civvies. "I stopped by my place and got the hot water going. We could go there and put my Jacuzzi tub to use." He wiggled his eyebrows and leered.

Sam seemed pulsed, her fingers wiggled and then she closed her fists. "I don't have any stuff at your house. I'd need to run by my place first."

"It's one night. I have an extra toothbrush. It's all yours."

She nervously grinned and sighed. "I need more than a toothbrush. I'll run by my house and then head your way."

Jack could tell he wasn't going to talk her out of going home. "I can go back to my place tomorrow. We'll stay at your house tonight."

"You're sure?"

He smiled. "Of course, I don't care where we are as long as we're there together."

Sam welcomed Jack home properly once they were inside. After an hour of fun and talk they both got ready for bed and fell asleep with their hands touching under the covers. It was just after five when the phone rang. Jack reached over Sam and picked it up on the third ring.

"Carter's."

"This is Major Simmons. I need to speak with Colonel Carter."

"K." Jack shook Sam. "It's for you Sam." She grunted. "Come on, wakey, wakey, sleepy head."

Jack put the phone up to her ear as her eyes fluttered open. She grunted a couple times as she rolled over. "Don't reboot. There's a spare hard drive in the vault. Take out the current hard drive and don't wipe it. I want to be able to examine it. Don't put in the spare hard drive until I get there." Sam tried three times before she got the phone back on the charger.

Jack sat up and rubbed his face. "Problem?"

"The dialing program is corrupt. We can't dial out."

"Crap. Gimme one sec in the bathroom and I'll get out of your way." Jack peed and brushed his teeth quickly. When he stepped out he was surprised to see Sam had fallen back asleep. Sam and Teal'c had always been quick to wake. He had seen them both go from a dead sleep to fighting for their lives in under ten seconds. Daniel was the one who could sleep through a raging inferno.

Jack grabbed her foot and gave it a shake. "You have a gate to get running Colonel." Sam pulled her foot back and mumbled. "What was that?"

"I'm up."

"I don't think I'm going to believe you until you're vertical." Sam struggled to sit up. Once her feet hit the floor Jack went to the kitchen and made coffee. His phone rang just as he poured coffee into a large travel mug. He was listening to the Secretary of Defense when Sam came into the kitchen. He handed her the mug and a protein bar.

"Yes, sir. I'll be heading to the base very soon. I understand." While Jack talked Sam took the mug, crossed the kitchen, and opened a cabinet. She took the lid off the mug and added something. Jack wondered if Sam had started putting cream or sugar to her coffee but he couldn't interrupt the Secretary of Defense to ask such a mundane question. He mouthed I love you and I'll see you soon as Sam left the kitchen and headed out the front door. He saw the protein bar lying on the counter just as he heard her engine crank.

Jack took a quick shower, made himself a cup of coffee, put Sam's protein bar in his pocket, and headed out to his truck. He decided he needed something substantial to start off what he expected to be a long day so he picked up an egg and bacon biscuit on the way to the mountain. He finished the biscuit and coffee before he got to the first security check point. He went straight to Hank's office and found him fielding calls from many of the same people who had been calling Jack that morning. Washington was already filled with theories about being hacked by Russia or China.

After waving hello Jack left Hank on the phone and went to the gate room and found Sam lying under the computer bench.

"You forgot something this morning." He placed the protein bar beside her on the ground. "Make sure you eat."

She glanced up at him. "I will." As she reached out for the protein bar her hand was shaking. When she saw him looking she made a fist and pulled her hand back.

Jack glanced at the full cup of coffee on the table above where she had crawled under the computer. He knew it had been filled at least once since she left the house. "More food and less caffeine."

She rolled her eyes at him and reached back out for her breakfast. Her hand was steadier. "I need about ten more minutes and I'll have the dialing computer ready to go again."

"Good. I'll leave you to it. Just don't forget to eat."

An hour later Jack went to Sam's office. She was on a computer and two Majors were set up along the far wall also working on computers. He watched them work for a few minutes before going up to Sam and whispering in her ear.

"Have you figured anything out yet?"

"We've found some of the code that's been corrupted. Major Eads thinks it is a common virus that was circulating on the internet a few months back."

Jack's head tilted as she talked. "I didn't think the gate was hooked up to the internet."

"It isn't."

"So how did this virus get on there?"

"That's the big question."

"Hank is dealing with a bunch of stuffed shirts that think we've been hacked. China and Russia are high on the list of possible suspects."

"I can't eliminate the possibility this was sabotage but it didn't happen through the internet."

"So somebody had to put this virus on the computer?"

"Yes."

Jack pursed his lips. "Stay at it. I'll be back later."

Jack went back to Hank's office and relayed Sam's information. She was sending regular email updates but the work was taking longer than Washington wanted. Just before one in the afternoon Jack returned with a tray of food. Sam was starring at the computer screen but her eyes looked glassy and dull. Jack sat the tray down but Sam didn't seem to notice him. He walked over to the two Majors still working away in the corner.

"Have you guys had lunch?"

Both men shook their heads. "No, sir."

"Get some food, go the bathroom, do whatever but take a break for a bit. You're dismissed." Both men glanced over at Sam. "I'm the highest ranking person in this room and I'm telling you to take a break. Now get." Both men stood, saluted, and got out of the room. Jack turned his attention back to Sam, who had not moved.

"Time for some sustenance. I brought you a roast beef sandwich, chips, jello, and a diet coke." Sam's eyes brightened a little.

"I need it. My coffee has worn off."

"I can tell. Here." Jack handed her the large cup of diet coke. She took a long sip and looked at the rest of the goodies on the tray.

"Did you bring yourself lunch too?"

"Of course. Figured it was a good excuse to eat with you and get an updated."

"Good plan." As Jack turned his back on her to get his food Sam opened a desk drawer. When he turned back around she was putting something in her drink. He gave her a questioning look.

"I'm adding a little lemon flavoring. Would you like some?"

Jack shook his head and placed the food on her small desk. They ate quickly as Sam told him they had determined the virus was introduced to the computer multiple times over the last three days. She still had no idea how the virus got into the system though. She wrote up a short report and sent it to General Landry while they ate. Jack left as the two Majors returned and sat at their respective computers.

Hank had already ordered the video surveillance of the computer area to be reviewed. It took several hours of searching but the video showed one of the newer technicians plugging in a thumb drive. They couldn't tell why he plugged it in or what he was doing but it was against regulations to plug a thumb drive into the dialing computer without approval so he was immediately brought in for questioning. By dinner time security had determined the technician in question had gotten bored and decided to load a game onto the dialing computer. He erased the game each night and had no idea his actions could introduce a virus onto the dialing computer. His thumb drive was confiscated and he was placed in the brig.

When Jack brought the thumb drive down to Sam he found her pacing the room behind the two Majors who were both still busily typing and scrolling. Sam's hands were fluttering and she was muttering about codes. She was clearly making both men nervous as she paced behind them. He moved towards her and put his hand on her shoulder. He spoke loud enough for all three of them could hear him.

"Sergeant Thompson has admitted to adding a game to the dialing computer. He wiped the game at the end of each shift and had no idea his usb could have a virus."

Both of the Majors turned towards Jack and Sam looked up at him. "Seriously? All this because some moron wanted to play games at work?"

"Apparently. He's in the brig for now and will be interrogated again but for now it doesn't look like he's a spy."

Major Eads spoke up. "That makes sense based on what we've found. The corruption isn't sophisticated. It looks like the virus is supposed to let hackers see what you do online, probably so they can steal your identity, but since the dialing computer isn't online nobody would have gained access. The Sergeant might want to double check his accounts though. If this is on his home computer he might have been ripped off."

Sam scowled. "It would serve him right. I can't believe I've spent all day staring at this computer because some little dweeb wanted to play games." Sam spun around and looked aimless for a moment. "Call it a night guys. I think we have enough evidence to say we aren't under attack. I'll ask Major Rhyne to keep looking at the code and we can verify this was just a stupid screw up on Monday."

Both men quickly followed her directions, happy to escape. Sam continued to pace the room as they cleared out. Sam picked up a notebook off her desk, flipped it open, closed it, and put it back down. She went over to one of the computers and opened three windows. She bent over and stared at the screen for a moment before shutting the computer down. She went to her desk and called Major Rhyne. She gave him a rambling summary of the issue as her right leg tapped out an erratic beat.


	9. Chapter 9

Jack offered to drive but Sam didn't want to leave her car at the base. They met at a steak house not far from base. Sam had a grilled chicken salad with ranch and diet coke. Jack ordered a grilled chicken sandwich with a salad as his side. He'd found it was tougher to keep his middle from bulging now that had a desk job. His splurge for the night was a beer. Sam went through three glass of diet soda in the time it took him to enjoy his one beer.

Jack followed Sam from the restaurant to her house. She crossed the center line twice and rode with two tires on the shoulder for several minutes. She was lucky she didn't meet any oncoming traffic. Sam beat him inside the house, put her pocketbook on the counter, and headed to the kitchen for a drink. Jack watched her from the living room.

"Do you have any beer?"

"Of course. Would you like one?"

"Please."

Sam came out to the living room carrying a beer and a diet soda. She plopped down on the sofa beside Jack and curled one leg under her bottom, which made her lean onto his shoulder. He lifted his arm and wrapped it around her. She handed him the beer.

"Thanks. You're going to turn into a diet soda at this rate."

She smiled."It helps me relax." She snuggled up against him as he searched for a movie.

Jack stretched as Top Gun ended. "I'm going to get ready for bed and check my email one last time."

"Sounds good. I'll be right behind you as soon as I clean up a bit."

Jack finished in the bathroom quickly, got out his laptop and climbed into bed. He was responding to an email when she came into the bedroom.

"You better be done by the time I get out." She grinned at him as he looked up.

"I'll be quick."

He was just logging off the system when the bathroom door opened. Sam was wearing a sheer shiny white negligee. He sucked in a breath. She walked over to his side of the bed and lifted the laptop off his legs.

"I hope you were done." She put the laptop on the side table.

"Close enough."

She flipped the covers back and climbed on Jack's lap. His hands ran over the silky fabric as their lips met. They kissed for several minutes. Jack flipped Sam onto her back and balanced his weight on his elbows. After several deep kisses Sam lifted her chin as Jack kissed her jaw and neck. He slowly worked his way down to her chest. He moved the silk aside. Several minutes later as his fingers moved to the edge of her underwear his over stimulated brain started telling him something was wrong. He paused for a moment and realized it was very quiet. Sam usually made soft mewling noises while they were having sex. He loved the sounds she made but she was currently quiet. He lifted his head and was dismayed to see Sam's head laying to her right with her mouth open. She suspected she was even drooling a little. He removed his fingers from the edge of her underwear, pulled her top down, and slid back up the bed. He rolled her onto her side, her usual sleeping position.

He lay beside her growing both angry and disappointed. He'd never had a woman fall asleep during sex and it was quite a blow to his manhood. He got up and went to the bathroom. He looked in her medicine cabinet, allergy medicine, heartburn medicine, aspirin, Tylenol, Advil, a couple tubes of cream he didn't want to read, a bottle of caffeine tablets, and the sleeping pills prescribed by her SGC doctor. He picked up the sleeping pills and read them. She had one refill left. He glanced back over at her. He put the pills back, went to the bed room, pulled the cover over her, turned out the light, and headed to the kitchen.

He knew right where to go, he'd seen her get something out earlier that morning. When he opened the cabinet he saw two boxes of small bottles. He picked one up and read it. It was essentially a bottle of caffeine. He grew angry as he stood there. He was tempted to throw them all out but he stopped himself. He closed the cabinet and went into the living room and turned on the television. He needed a distraction. He couldn't believe Daniel had been right. Sam was using sleeping pills to deal with the nightmares and large quantities of caffeine to fight the effects of the sleeping pills. He was both worried about her and angry that she had let this happen.

After a couple unmemorable shows he turned off the television and headed back to the bedroom. He looked at Sam from the bedroom door. The hall light was shining on her and she looked so peaceful. He dreaded confronting this but he also knew he couldn't let it slide. He turned off the light and climbed into bed behind her. He curled up around her and pulled her close.

He was up about an hour before her the next morning. He ran out and bought apple turnovers and scones from her favorite bakery. The coffee pot was full when she got up.

"Good morning beautiful."

"Mmmmmm…morning." She bent down and kissed the top of his head and she walked past him on her way to the kitchen. He got up and followed her. She spied the treats quickly. "What's in the box?"

"Apple turnovers and cinnamon scones." She spun towards him and smiled.

"My favorites."

"I know." He put his arms around her and gave her a quick kiss on her jaw. "Do we have plans today?"

"Not that I know of, why?"

"I was thinking we could have a lazy day, just lie around watching movies and eating popcorn."

Sam gave him a slow smile. "That sounds like a possibility." After a quick peck on the lips Sam turned away from him and picked up the coffee cup he had left out for her. She put it up in the cabinet and got out a larger mug. Jack got out plates for their breakfast. He places the plates on the counter as Sam poured a large cup of black coffee. She opened the cabinet where the caffeine was stored but she closed it as she glanced over her shoulder and saw him watching her.

"Do you want your turnover heated up?"

Sam nodded. "That would be good. Thanks."

They took their food and coffee into the living room and turned on the morning news. Sam tucked her feet under her bottom and leaned towards him as she downed her coffee and nibbled on her scone. When the second set of commercials came on Sam headed back to the kitchen with her empty mug. Jack quietly followed her. She filled the mug, got out a bottle of the caffeine supplement and poured it into her coffee.

"Adding some lemon to your coffee?" Sam tensed and looked over her shoulder.

"Spying on me?"

Jack decided to ignore her bait. "Sitting around the house relaxing requires caffeine shots?"

She spun on her heel, opened a second bottle, and drank it down quickly. "Yes."

"This isn't you Sam."

"There's nothing wrong with it. It's over the counter. I'm not breaking any rules."

"If there's nothing wrong with it why did you lie to me about it?"

She looked down at the floor. "You don't understand."

He stepped towards her. "You're wrong. I understand all too well." He sighed. "Do you honestly think if the SGC doctors knew about your habit you'd be allowed off world, even if it is over the counter?"

She lifted her head and made eye contact. "What are you saying?"

He clenched his jaw and met her stare. "I'm saying you aren't fit to go off world."

Sam snarled and barely hissed out her shock, "How dare you threaten me."

Jack held up his hands. "I don't mean to be threatening you but you know you can't take sleeping pills or caffeine shots off world. You need to be able to function without them."

"It's not a sleeping pill. It just helps me relax so I can get to sleep easier."

"It seemed a lot like a sleeping pill last night."

Sam shook her head. "What are you talking about?"

"You fell asleep while we were…you know."

"Is that what this is about? I insulted your manhood because you were so boring I fell asleep during sex?"

Jack took a deep breath and counted to five inside his head. "This is about you not currently being fit for duty."

Sam tilted her head to the right. "Excuse me."

"You shouldn't be taking SG-1 off world right now."

Sam's lips tightened into a pucker. "I haven't broken any rules."

Jack nodded slowly. "Technically, maybe not, but that doesn't mean you should be leading a team off world."

"Good thing you aren't my superior officer. This isn't your decision to make."

"Do the right thing Sam. Call off this mission." Sam stepped back as Jack walked over to her cabinet of caffeine, picked up a small bottle, and turned it towards her. "And get rid of these things."

"You're making a mountain out of a molehill. I'm fine."

"Pull out of the mission or I will have no choice but talk to Hank."

"Get out."

Jack's eyes widened. "What?"

"You heard me. Get out of my house."

Jack took a step towards her. "You don't really mean this. You're just upset."

"Hell yes I'm upset. You're threatening me and I want you out now."

"I don't want to threaten you but I also can't stand by and let you put SG-1 in harm's way."

Sam's back was stiff and her arms were crossed. She turned her back to him. "Get out of my house now."

Jack stepped back. "Alright." He went to the bedroom and quickly packed what little stuff he had with him. Sam was curled up on the sofa when he walked back into the living room. "I'll be at my house if you want to talk."

"Fine."

"If not, I will see you on base tomorrow."

"Just go."

Sam listened to the door latch behind him. He walked stiffly to his truck and sat there for a moment, hoping she would come to the door. When she didn't appear he drove off. Once she heard the engine of his truck fade into the distance she let herself cry.


	10. Chapter 10

Jack couldn't sleep so he got to the mountain early Monday morning. It didn't take him long to find what he wanted on the computer. Jack arrived for SG-1s mission briefing about five minutes late, on purpose.

"General O'Neill, welcome. Please join us." Hank stretched his hand towards an empty chair.

"Thank you." Sam avoided making eye contact as Jack sat down across from her. He saw her shoulders stiffen slightly but there were no other signs of her discomfort. "Please don't let me interrupt. Continue as you were."

General Landry nodded. "MALP data indicates there are some manmade structures on the planet so we hope there is some civilization nearby. This will be a first contact mission, one of your specialties."

"The writing on the stone markers near the gate appears related to Babylonian script." Daniel held up a picture.

"Well, excellent." General Landry pointed towards the picture. "Do you need more time for a translation or will you be ready to depart tomorrow?"

"I'm not sure I have enough here to do a full translation…" Jack nudged Daniel so much his chair slid slightly sideways. "But more time couldn't hurt."

Sam knew what was going on and it made her angry. She had thought perhaps Jack had been making an empty threat but now she knew he had already talked to Hank. She decided the best thing she could do was try to save face and keep her record clean.

"Sir, I think it would be good to give Daniel some additional time to make more progress. It never hurts to know as much as possible." Although Sam was avoiding looking at Jack or Daniel she felt their collected sigh of relief.

"Agreed, I will put this mission back on the schedule for next week." General Landry looked towards Daniel. "Please keep me up to date on your progress. If you need more time we can discuss it when we get back together on…let's say Friday at 1000. If there are no other concerns or questions this meeting is adjourned. Jack if you have a few minutes there is a project I'd like to discuss before you leave today."

"You got it." Both men headed into General Landry's office. Daniel tried to approach Sam but she put her hand up and left the room. She briefly tried to work but it was useless. She grabbed her stuff and headed home early.

She had been home for almost two hours when he knocked on her door. She was trying to decide whether or not to get up off the sofa and answer when she heard him using his key. She took a deep breath.

"Sam? Are you here?"

"Yes." Her arms and legs were crossed and her back was stiff as he walked into the room. She did not turn to look at him.

"When you weren't in your lab I hoped I'd find you here. I fly out in a couple hours and I wanted to say good bye."

"Good bye."

He walked around in front of her and dropped five reports on the coffee table. "I highlighted some sections I hope you'll read."

Her brow knitted as she glanced in his direction. "Please leave your key on your way out."

Jack swallowed and tensed his lips. "So we aren't even going to talk about this?"

Sam shook her head. "There isn't anything to talk about."

Jack took a deep breath. "Right, call me when you're ready to talk."

Sam gave him a curt nod but never made eye contact. He laid her key on the small table beside her door and left. Her anger turned into sorrow hours after he was in the air. She ignored the reports.

More than a week passed without a word from Sam, no calls or emails. Each day of silence made it seem more likely that their relationship was over. Jack plunged into his work, staying late and arriving early. He even found time to hit the gym each day. None of that stopped him from checking his email and messages regularly.

It was a little after three in the afternoon on Tuesday when Jack got a call from the Cheyenne area code. He picked up before the second ring.

"General Jack O'Neill speaking."

"You can't let her do this!"

"Daniel what are you talking about."

"Sam's leaving."

"Leaving?"

"Yes. You have to stop her."

"She isn't exactly listening to me these days." Jack was busily typing, looking for paperwork about Sam's resignation.

"But Sam can't just leave. Who's going to lead SG-1? What's she going to do in Nevada any way?"

Jack stopped typing. "Nevada?"

"Exactly! What the heck does Nevada offer that she can't get here? It doesn't make any sense Jack!"

"Is she resigning from the Air Force and moving to Nevada?"

"I never said anything about her resigning. She's transferring to Area 51. She's going to work on some kind of project but you can't seriously tell me there is any project she'd want to work on more than go through the gate. There has to be some mistake. I mean I know people request her all the time but you've never let anyone steal her before. Stop it this time."

"Calm down Daniel. Let me see what I can learn on this end. When is she leaving?"

"That's just it Jack, she left today. She went out of town on Thursday and came back Sunday evening. She was busy all day yesterday so I didn't get to see her. Today she stops by my office to let me know she's leaving and boom she's gone. No explanation or anything."

"That's very odd."

"Tell me about it. After all these years Teal'c and I really deserve a bit more notice and an explanation."

"Right." Jack had found the transfer paperwork in the system. Sam was being loaned to Roswell. The paperwork wasn't completely finished but it looked like all the involved parties were in agreement.

"Did you know she was leaving?"

"No. Like I said, we haven't been talking much lately."

"Oh…I'm sorry."

"Me too."

"So is there anything you can do to stop her?"

"Even if there was I wouldn't. I learned a long time ago that once she makes up her mind she's going to do it her way."

"But this is the wrong decision."

"It might feel wrong to you but Sam thinks everything through and if this is right in her opinion you have to let her do it."

"I thought you'd be more help."

"Sorry Danny-boy. You're barking up the wrong tree."

Daniel sighed. "Well I guess thanks anyway." Daniel hung up and left Jack staring at the screen showing Sam's transfer details. Knowing she had made a decision this big without talking to him confirmed his belief that their relationship was over. He made it through two late afternoon meetings but he couldn't really recall much of what was said in either meeting. Good thing there would be minutes he could read later.

It was almost six when his secretary interrupted his distracted thoughts. "I'm heading home sir. I hope you don't stay much longer."

Jack glanced up, "I'll leave soon."

"Promise?"

Jack grinned slightly. "Yes."

"Good because you need to relax more. You've been very stressed lately."

Jack nodded slightly. "Have a good night."

"Good night. I'll see you tomorrow."

Jack worked for another half hour but his thoughts kept drifting to Sam so he wasn't making any progress. She wasn't technically leaving the stargate program, since she was on loan but Jack knew this was a major move for Sam and it bothered him that she had done it without telling him anything. Her life had centered on the gate for longer than he had known her and now she was walking away from it while shutting out all her friends. Her anger at him was understandable but turning her back on Daniel did not make sense. Jack was worried about her but he didn't want to push her if she wasn't ready so despite his intense desire to call her he turned off his desk lamp and headed home. It occurred to him on the drive home that he didn't even know where to call if he wanted to find her. Perhaps once she got to her new post he could come up with a plausible reason to call or write her. He tossed and turned all night, finally giving up on more sleep a little after five in the morning. He went for a run, showered, and arrived at work a little before his secretary. She fussed at him for getting so little sleep and then she brought him plenty of coffee.

His day was full of meetings, papers, and emails, like usual. As the day winded down he was having a hard time keeping his eyes open. His secretary kicked him out as she was leaving for the night. As he opened the door to his apartment he was surprised to see his living room light on. He quietly sat his briefcase down and slowly closed the door behind him. He tensed for a fight when he heard movement inside.

"Hi, Jack." He stopped his slow walk when he heard her voice. "I let myself in."

He walked the rest of the way into his living room. She was standing beside his loveseat. "You're always welcome here Sam."

"Still?" She looked miserable. There were bags under her eyes and her face was pale.

He took two more steps towards her. "Absolutely." She gave him a small tense grin. He closed the space between them, wrapped his arms around her waist, and pulled her tight against his body. Her arms wrapped around his shoulders and she slid her left hand into the hair at the base of his neck. He turned his face into the curve where her neck met her shoulders.

"I thought you were done with me."

"I'm so sorry Jack. It took me a couple days to realize you were right."

He lifted his head and looked her in the eyes. "And then?"

She grimaced. "And then I was embarrassed. I needed to figure out how I was going to handle this."

"Alone?" Sam looked away and nodded. He backed up slightly and searched her face. "Have you had dinner?"

She shook her head no. "I didn't want to risk missing you and honestly I was too nervous to eat."

"Nervous?"

"A bit."

"Why?"

"I was worried that you wouldn't want me back."

Jack moved her bangs to the right but they fell right back into place. "I have no interest in ever losing you. I love you Sam." He kissed her but as the kiss deepened he lifted his face away. "Let's get some dinner. I'd like to hear about your transfer."

Her eyes widened and she tensed. "You already know? Have you been keeping tabs on me?"

He shook his head. "Daniel called yesterday. You have him quite worked up."

"Really?"

"Really. You might want to give him a call later. Let him know you aren't abandoning him."

"Abandoning him? Seriously?"

"This is Daniel we're talking about. He has a tendency to blow things out of proportion."

"Right."

Jack loosened his hold on Sam and took another step back. "How about pizza for dinner? There's a nice little place just around the corner. We could walk."

"Pizza sounds good."

They walked hand in hand to the restaurant, which was a hole in wall filled to brim with happy customers. They both ordered a beer to go with their large pizza. She excused herself and went to the bathroom after they ordered. She took her time and the beer had arrived by the time she got back to the table.

"So tell me about your new job."

"I'll be working on the Prometheus and developing some new technology at Area 51. They've been asking me to join them for a while and it seemed like the right time. I needed a break from the SGC."

"But you're just on loan?"

"Yeah. I can go back to the SGC at any point."

"Good."

She twisted her lips and looked across the table at him. "That doesn't mean I plan to go back anytime soon."

"When are you moving?"

"Yesterday." Sam dug into her purse and pulled out a set of keys. She held out the keychain towards him. "I never should have asked for my house key back. I want you to have it and a key to my apartment."

His eyes widened. "You really were determined to do this all alone." He took the keys from her.

Their pizza arrived, giving Sam a chance to get her bearings. Jack served them each up a piece and sat her plate in front of her. "I could have come and helped you move."

She picked at her crust. "I didn't take much with me. I rented a furnished apartment so all I took was some clothes and kitchen gadgets. It wasn't hard."

"That wasn't exactly my point Sam. You shut us all out. None of us even knew you were moving."

She didn't look up. "I'm sorry."

He reached across the table and put his hand over hers. "We've both been single for a long time and we take pride on doing things on our own. To make a relationship work we have to lean on each other, at least sometimes."

"I know you're right. There isn't much else I can say at this point other than I'm sorry."

Jack nodded, let go of her hand, and took a bite of his pizza. Sam continued to pick at her crust. Jack nodded at her plate. "Please eat something."

Sam nodded but she still didn't pick up her slice. "So how did you pick Area 51?"

"I've been making trips there every few weeks for the last couple of years to work on different projects but a few days here and there wasn't really letting me make as much progress as I wanted. I'll technically be in charge of a few departments so that's more paperwork but it's a small price to pay to escape these nightmares."

She looked up at him and there was a glistening of tears in her eyes. "I wasn't going to be able to shake this off as long as the nightmares continue."

"And you know you won't have nightmares there?"

"I didn't when I visited last week or last night."

"Good, now eat." Jack was finishing his first slice and Sam had not yet made any noticeable progress. Sam took a bite of her pizza. It was really good and once she tasted the melted cheese hunger grabbed her attention. Jack was pleased to see her eating. She looked like she had lost a few pounds since he'd last seen her, a displeasing thought.


	11. Chapter 11

Jack stepped up behind Sam as she was putting the pizza box in the refrigerator. He put his arms around her and spun her as she straightened. His kiss was insistent and deep. She responded just as he had hoped. When they parted they were both flushed and breathing a bit faster. He took her hand and led her to bedroom.

Sam curled in tight against Jack's side. "That might just make it worth pissing you off once in a while."

He sighed and looked up at the ceiling. "I was never angry."

She tiled her head up, which left her looking at his jaw and ear. "Really?"

"Really." He turned his head and kissed her forehead. "I was scared we were over. Every day that passed left me more convinced."

"I'm sorry Jack."

"I know and you don't need to keep saying it." He rubbed his thumb across the edge of her bare breast as he pulled her slightly closer. Her sharp intake of breath and hip thrust made him smile. "Did you consider coming back to the Pentagon, when you were thinking about moving?"

"Briefly. I didn't want to risk ending up in your chain of command and all the good research has moved to the SGC and Area 51. If I had come back to the Pentagon I would be stuck at a desk."

"And being stuck at a desk is bad?"

She kissed his jaw. "Very, it makes you old and slow."

"Slow!" He rolled her over and trapped her hands over her head. "Are you calling me slow?"

Sam was laughing. "Maybe."

Jack rolled over and put his arm out when he woke the next morning. He was disappointed to find he was alone in bed. Sam was sitting in the kitchen sipping a small cup of coffee eating a pop tart.

"Good morning beautiful. Did you sleep well?"

"Morning. I didn't have any nightmares, if that's what you're asking. You really need better breakfast options." She held up the pop tart.

Jack grinned, "I don't often eat breakfast here, sorry. We could go out."

Sam shook her head, "You need to get to work and technically I've eaten."

"I could play hooky."

"No you can't, there's world saving stuff to do."

He bent down and kissed her head. "Last night you said I was just an old slow paper pusher."

She laughed again, "Then you proved me wrong."

"Damn right I did." Jack grinned, poured himself a cup of coffee and took it to the bedroom to drink while he got dressed. Sam was curled up on his sofa watching the morning news when he came back out. "How about I ditch work early and take tomorrow off?"

She looked up at him. "That sounds good."

His brow furrowed. "When exactly are you leaving?"

"Are you anxious for me to be gone already?"

He shook his head, "Not at all. I just want to know how little time I have with you so we can make the most of it."

She grinned, "Aren't you quite the romantic this morning. There's a transport to Area 51 Sunday midmorning."

"Alright, a long weekend it is. I'll be home before five. My secretary might dance when I tell her I'm going to take some time off."

"Does she dance often?"

"No, I should write a memo about that and push it around." He kissed her good bye and headed to work, happier than he had been in weeks. They spent a relaxing long weekend together. Sam only slept about five hours a night but her sleep was nightmare free. By the time Sam got on her plane Jack felt like they had a chance to make this relationship work. Sam's caffeine consumption didn't appear to be higher than anyone else working her hours in a stressful environment and for the first time in months her nightmares were gone. He still wondered if seeing his face on her attacker night after night had been part of what kept her from moving to Washington. No matter what she kept telling him it had to be hard to keep him separate from the man trying to kill her over and over each night.

They went back to talking each night. He often called her in the mornings when he got to work, which happened to be just about the time she was getting up. She made amends with Daniel and Teal'c. They both came to visit her new apartment after she had a couple weeks to get settled in. She fit in well with the geeks at Area 51 and her field experience was an added bonus that led more than one of them to seek out her assistance. By the end of her first month she was back to feeling like her old self, well rested without a sleeping pill and alert without too much caffeine.

Jack visited her once a month and she went to Washington once a month so they saw each other for a long weekend every couple of weeks. Cassie came to stay for a week and they went on hikes every afternoon. Cassie even talked her into a mani-pedi. Sam felt a little guilty living in Nevada because it was like being on vacation. Teal'c was working with the free Jaffa and Daniel was packing for Atlantis, which helped Sam feel better about running off to Area 51. All was going so well and then her phone rang.

"Colonel Carter, I'm Lieutenant Colonel Cameron Mitchell. I've recently been assigned to Cheyenne Mountain and I hoped you were about ready to come back and rejoin SG-1."

"SG-1 is on hiatus."

"I know but it's time for you to come back. There's a lot more that needs to be done."

"I'm doing good stuff here."

"I'm sure you are but you could be doing even better stuff here."

"What have Teal'c and Daniel said to this proposal?"

"You're the real key here."

"So that means you haven't convinced them either, right?"

"Not yet but once you come back they'll…"

"Sorry but you're barking up the wrong tree. There are plenty of good folks there. Make your own team and go do all that stuff that needs to be done."

"I'll be calling again."

"Good bye." Sam stared at the phone for a moment before pulling up what records she could find online about Lieutenant Colonel Cameron Mitchell. He had a good record with a few interesting highlights along the way. He had been very helpful in Antarctica. She hoped he got what he wanted from General Landry. Two days later when Jack called her she was surprised to hear about Mitchell again.

"Hey sexy, how was your day?"

"Productive. You?"

Paperwork and meetings, nothing new. So did you get a call from Mitchell the other day?"

"I did actually. How did you know?"

"He called me today. He's been spinning his wheels trying to get SG-1 back together."

"That's what he said when he called."

"He's driving Daniel nuts."

Sam laughed. "He's a big boy, he can handle it."

"So you aren't ready to go back?" Her silence worried him. "Sam?"

"I'm doing well here. We've made a lot of upgrades on Prometheus."

"I know. Your reports are impressive. I just wanted to check and make sure you're not regretting your decision."

The underlying level of guilt for having abandoned her team rose to the level but she refused to admit it. "As I've told you many times, I'm very happy."

Her tone made it clear he had pushed as far as was safe. "Your happiness is my goal."

"Thank you. I better get some sleep."

"Sleep well. We'll talk again tomorrow. I love you."

"I love you too."

Her desire to go through the gate had not diminished but her fear of that damn nightmare was also eating at her. She stared at the ceiling for two hours before she gave up on sleep and turned on her bedside lamp and grabbed a meaningless book. She read for an hour before falling asleep. She was tired the next morning so she splurged by having a second cup of coffee. She stayed busy working on multiple projects at Area 51 and the days ticked by.

"So I hear Daniel has a new best friend."

Jack laughed out loud. "He sounds downright miserable."

"I should feel worse for him."

"This is what he gets for being so friendly and trying to communicate with everyone."

"So can he really not be separated from her?"

"Not a bit. Daedalus left without him."

"I bet he's devastated."

"He does get to go on a treasure hunt. Mitchell may have convinced Teal'c to join them. Did he call you again?"

"He did but I'm really very busy here."

"You could join up with them later."

"I'm good here."

"If you say so."

"Don't start Jack."

"I didn't mean to start anything. I'm sorry if it sounded like I was."

"I guess I'm a bit sensitive. Sorry."

"It's ok. I'm still headed your way this weekend, as long as nothing big comes up. I'm looking forward to seeing you."

"Same here. I'll make us dinner."

"Mmmmmm, yum."

"Is that sarcasm?"

"Absolutely not." Jack was glad she couldn't see his grin.

Jack seemed very serious when Sam picked him up from the airport. He put his duffle in the backseat and kept his briefcase at his feet.

"Have you read Daniel's report about the Ori?"

"I've heard about it but I haven't been able to read it."

"I brought it with me in case you said that. I think we have a big problem and I want your take on it."

"I can do that. Why do you think it's so bad?"

"You should have heard Daniel. It's another group of people who believe they are all powerful and want lots of people to follow them. That's always a bad combination."

"It doesn't usually work out well for us or the poor slobs being led to damnation."

"Damnation sounds about right. The report says they literally burn people to death."

"Oh God!"

"Exactly, nuts right."

"Mitchell still hasn't picked new people for SG-1 but I've given him a deadline."

"I know. He already left me two more messages. He's very persistent."

"Not a bad quality."

"I guess not."

Sam read the report as soon as they got to her apartment. She was appalled at the brutality displayed by the Ori. She agreed with Jack's assessment and knew the Ori would have to be dealt with very soon. She feared this meant she wasn't going to be able to stay at Area 51 much longer. She knew that what was now a request was soon going to become an order.

"Hey Sam, I wish I could say this was a social call but…"

"But it's not. I've been expecting this for a while now."

"According to the snakey guest at the SGC there's a gate that has been open for more than two days. When something defies the laws of physics you're the person I call."

"I'll be there ASAP."

"I'll see you there."

"Really?"

"Really, now get going, and Sam…"

"Yes?"

"I love you, never forget that."

"I love you too. Now I gotta catch a ride."

"Bye."

Sam didn't need to collect any belongs, she had left everything she needed in her home and technically she was heading home. A ride was waiting at the airport so she quickly changed into her dress uniform and left. She went straight to General Landry's office when she got to the SGC. She was only mildly surprised to find Jack was already there. She assumed he called her while he was on the way there.


	12. Chapter 12

Jack was waiting for her when she got home. He had been kept up to date about her mission with the IOC representatives where they were nearly killed by some alien bugs. He stood as soon as he heard her key in the door. She knew something was up when she saw all her lights on so she didn't freak out when he grabbed her as she came through the door.

"You had me scared."

"I'm sure they made it sound worse than it really was."

"I hate not being out there watching your back."

"Be glad you didn't have to see it. Those bugs were disgusting. Watching them pop out of Myers was horrific." She shivered slightly as she thought about it. Jack's hug tightened. "I'm really glad you're here."

"I decided it would be best if I waited here since I knew I wouldn't be able to stop myself from hugging you, just to confirm you were really ok."

"A wise plan." They kissed and then Jack helped Sam remove her coat. She took off her shoes and headed for the kitchen. She pulled a diet soda out of the refrigerator. "Would you like something?"

Jack tilted his head towards her living room. "I already helped myself." She leaned to her right and saw his beer bottle on the table beside the sofa. It made her grin knowing he was comfortable in her home. She headed to the sofa, leaving just enough room for Jack to sit between her and his beer. As soon as he was seated she scooted closer and he wrapped his right arm around her. They talked briefly about her latest mission but it was clear she had no interest in dwelling on it so he told her about his boring meetings.

It got late and they got ready for bed, where Sam showed him she wasn't as tired as he had assumed. The weeks of separation induced by their careers did make getting together sweet. He dreamed about her when they were separated but his dreams did not live up to reality. He also loved learning what made her moan, and even better what made her scream out his name.

They fell asleep after making love. They had been asleep for a couple hours when Jack woke because he heard a high pitched mewling. He lay still waiting to hear the sound again. He was about to fall back asleep when he heard it again. He turned his head towards Sam. Her hands were fisted and curled under her chin. She was the source of the high pitched moan. Jack sat up on his elbow to get a better look at her. Her face was twisted and tight. He scooted closer to her and put his arm around her.

"Sam?" Her muscles stayed tense. "Hey, Sam. Wake up, sweetie." He rubbed her back as he spoke softly. He hoped she would gently wake up but it wasn't working. "Carter?" She started twitching and it turned into a full out shaking. "Carter!"

She swung out as she woke up. He caught her wrist just before she contacted his face. Her breathing was elevated and her eyes were wide.

"Sam? You were having a nightmare." He assumed she had been reliving the bugs, something that seemed worthy of many nightmares. Her lower jaw started trembling and she wrapped her arms around his neck. She pushed him backwards as she rolled onto him.

"Not again."

He held her close and rubbed her back. "Again?"

"It's back." Jack's body tensed as he figured out what she meant. "I can't do this again."

Jack's heart twisted. "Yes, yes you can. You're the strongest person I've ever known." He rubbed her back as her tears dropped on his chest. "You won't be alone either. I'm here."

Sam nodded, getting angry at her own tears. "I thought it was over."

"I know sweetie. I know."

Sam sniffed. "I'm sorry I over reacted. It just took me by surprise."

"You're fine." Jack's hands kept moving on her naked back. He was waiting for her muscles to relax but she stayed tense. They didn't talk. Her arms were around his neck and after several minutes her leg slid up and curled around Jack's thigh. He sucked in a breath as his arousal grew. He knew the time wasn't right and he tried to get his reaction under control. He knew she could feel his body's response.

"I'm sorry Sam. He has a mind of his own and he really likes you. Actually he loves you, especially a naked you."

Sam giggled, a sound he loved to hear. "I rather like him a lot too." Sam nibbled on his neck and he sucked in a breath, surprised by her change in attitude.

She shifted her hips and rubbed herself against him. His grip on her tightened and he slid his hand down to her hip. He tilted his head and captured her lips in a kiss. Their tongues danced for dominance. He was never one to look a gift horse in the mouth so he dived in. She made it clear she was in control and that worked for him. She used his body to reach her climax and he loved watching it happen. She didn't stop after her release. She kept moving until he screamed out her name. Her smile afterwards showed she was pleased with the results of her efforts.

She lay down on top of him, still smiling. "You are a seriously amazing woman." He felt her total relaxation as she lay on top of him. He wrapped his arms around her. "Yep, amazing."

She rolled off of him and curled up against him. "That was just what I needed."

"Happy to oblige."

He held her until she fell asleep again. He only let himself drift back off once he knew she was asleep. A few hours later Sam's nightmare started again. Her movements and moaning woke Jack. He held her and caressed her but didn't wake her. He let the nightmare conclude, after which she woke but was able to get back to sleep. Being in his arms helped her know it was only a nightmare; the danger was many years behind her.

They were both tired when they woke the next morning. Sam was anxious to get to the mountain to look for the energy reading previously associated with her nightmare and Jack decided to tag along. She headed straight to her lab so he went to the commissary to load up on snacks and coffee, which he delivered to her lab. He handed her a cup of coffee.

"Well?"

"It's here again. I'm going to try and track down the source." She took a sip of the coffee before grabbing a pair of pliers.

"Whatcha' doing?"

"Last time they weren't able to narrow down a source because they could read this signature everywhere in the mountain and for many miles outside of it. I hope if I can improve the sensitivity of this scanner I will be able to find a source."

Jack watched her work for about ten minutes before he grew bored. He waved his hands in the air, "I'm gonna go do something."

Sam nodded, not looking up from the handheld scanner. "Ok."

He found her two hours later wandering the halls. He followed her for several feet. "Jack?"

He frowned. "How long did you know I was back here?"

"Since corridor C."

"Damn." He was losing his touch.

She giggled. "I learned from the best." Her comment made him smile.

"True. Is it working?"

She let the scanner hang down to her side and turned around. "No, actually." She scowled. "Just like before the energy signature is distributed evenly through the whole mountain, at least everywhere I've been."

Jack pointed to her scanner. "Are you going to make more adjustments to your doohickey?"

Sam held it up and looked at it. "I'm not really sure what else to do to it."

"In that case, how about we get out of here. I am guessing you skipped lunch so an early dinner out might work for you."

Sam scowled at the machine before looking up at Jack. Her scowl turned to a smile. "Sounds good." They collected Daniel, Teal'c, and Mitchell, making it a team night. Sam had another tough night but Jack held her when she woke and helped her get back to sleep. He stayed for two days before he had no choice but return to Washington. He called every night and reminded her to call if she had a nightmare. She didn't take him up on his offer but it was nice to know the offer existed.

She grew tired over the next few days but instead of using sleeping pills she added naps when she could. She was both surprised and happy to discover being shifted out of phase eliminated her nightmares. She had worried Mitchell might discover her issue while they were stuck together but her fears turned out to be unnecessary.

Being back in phase meant returning to her nightmares. Chasing the Ori gave her a reprieve so her nightmare made coming home bittersweet.

"General Landry, reporting as ordered."

"Thank you Colonel Carter. Please, take a seat." Sam sat in the chair across from his desk. "I know you have been very busy with the Ori as well as several other projects but I have a favor to ask."

"Of course, sir." Sam gave him a tight smile. She was both busy and very tired. "What can I do?"

"There's this scientist," He looked down at a folder on his desk, "a Dr. Malcolm, who wants to go to Atlantis."

"There's a long line of scientists, as well as others, who would love to go sir."

"I understand Colonel but this gentleman has been very insistent since returning from the Beta site a few weeks ago. He came to the government's attention because of his work with holograms. We wanted him to adapt his work to shield technology but so far he hasn't had much success. He believes if he could study the Atlantis cloak it would help him. I suspect he is still doing his original hologram work instead of the shield work he was assigned but I'm not sure. I hoped you would be willing to review his work and his proposal for going to Atlantis."

"Of course, sir." He handed her a folder.

"This is his proposal. He had it ready as soon as he stepped through the gate from the Beta site. I'm sure his older research can be accessed in our archives."

"I'll get right on it, sir."

"I would appreciate it. His calls have become very annoying and his visits are even worse."

Sam took the folder home that night and read through the proposal. The General was right, Dr. Malcolm was clearly still interested in hologram technology not shields. Sam understood hiding could at times be as helpful as a shield but that wasn't the area of research Dr. Malcolm had been hired to pursue. She knew it was hard to give up an interest to which you were dedicated, even passionate about, but Dr. Malcolm was taking advantage of the resources provided to him without producing results. She put the folder away when Jack called to wish her a good night.

The next morning Sam read up on Dr. Malcolm's past research. He spent a couple years working on holograms at the pentagon. He was sent to Area 51 where he was asked to begin researching shields instead of holograms. He was then transferred to the SGC. After a few months at the SGC his department was sent to the Beta site to test different shields, none of which worked out. He heard about the Atlantis cloak and felt his experience would be better put to use there than here. He was very clear about his interest in hologram as opposed to shields and Sam couldn't help but wonder whether his lack of interest in shields contributed to his lack of progress over the years.

After lunch she decided it was time to pay Dr. Malcolm a visit, if for no other reason than she had better things to do with her time than convince this guy to do his job and leave the General alone so she might as well get it over with quickly. Sam took the elevator up to level nineteen. His lab was brightly lit and there were multiple computers on when she entered the room. There were four men and two women working in the relatively large space.

"Dr. Malcolm?" Everyone in the room turned in her direction, which didn't help her identify the man. Finally a man in the back of the room stood and walked her way.

"I'm Dr. Malcolm. You're Colonel Carter, correct?"

"Yes, it's a pleasure to meet you." Sam extended her hand and after a brief pause Dr. Malcolm shook her hand.

"You also." He looked around the room as the handshake ended. "Out of curiosity what brings you to my neck of the woods."

"General Landry asked me to read over your request to go to Atlantis."

Dr. Malcolm scowled. "Did he?"

"Yes, it isn't uncommon for me to consult on scientific matters. I have a great deal of expertise in many different alien technologies."

"I understand you are well qualified to review my research but it would have been polite to inform me so I could have prepared a report better tailored to your level of knowledge."

Sam grinned. "Your report was clear and well written. I had hoped you could show me around your lab and tell me a bit more about shielding."

He let out a sigh. "Of course Colonel, I would be happy to stop all my work and spend my time giving you a tour."

Sam gave him a tight smile but tried to hide her annoyance. "Excellent. I happen to have a bit of time between saving the world and saving the world so now works well for me also."

After showing her the different computer programs running and introducing her to the other scientists they went to his small office to talk. He sat behind his desk and Sam took the only other chair in the room, across from his tiny metal desk.

"So Colonel, now that you've seen the lab what do you intent to tell the General?"

"I still have a few more questions actually. Earlier in your career you worked with holograms but over the last few years you've been working with shield technologies. What similarities and difference do you see in the two fields?"

"They share energy signatures. I've focused on producing holograms that are also shields."

"But so far?"

Dr. Malcolm twisted up his lips. His eyes hardened. "So far I have been unsuccessful but that will change when I get to Atlantis."

Sam tilted her head. "Why do you think so?"

"The hologram technology I've based my work on so far is inferior to the Atlantis cloak. I mean creating a hologram around a person takes much less energy than around a whole city. I understand that keeping a hologram stable around a moving person is technologically impressive, especially when the hologram can disguise your true height and size, but hiding a whole city is amazing."

Sam was shaking her head. "What hologram have you been basing your work upon?"

Dr. Malcolm stood and went over to cabinet. He opened the cabinet door and punched in a series of numbers on a key pad. The door of a safe opened. He pulled out a velvet bag and walked back to his desk. "This." He pulled out one of the personal hologram generating devices used by aliens in an attempted to overtake the SGC.

Sam just stared at it. "How did you get this? It is supposed to be locked down."

"I keep it in the safe when I am not working with it."

"That isn't what I mean. These used to be kept under lock and key at Area 51."

Dr. Malcolm grinned. "You mean before they were appropriated without your knowledge? The hologram program had been on a hiatus but after you used one to create a personal hologram that last six minutes I was asked to look back into potential uses of these holograms."

"Who authorized this?"

"I got my orders from General Myers."

Sam managed to not roll her eyes. General Myers was closely tied to the NID and although they had not been able to prove he was associated with the rogue elements that had caused trouble in the past General Hammond and General O'Neill both suspected he was dirty. "I see. So after the Pentagon what did you do?"

"The team working on the shields was sent to Area 51 for a while and then here. I wasn't able to bring the personal shield generator with me initially because there were others at the Pentagon working with it. Once they were done General O'Neill brought it to me here. A couple months ago my team had a prototype shield to test so we were sent to the Beta site and I took the hologram generator with me so I could keep studying it. I've taken it apart and put it back together twice. It still works. Would you like to try it?"

Sam shook her head. "No, thanks. I'm good." Sam stood. "I'll relay your information to General Landry and let him talk to General Myers about your request to go to Atlantis since he is the one who has ordered you to research holograms."

Sam pondered Dr. Malcolm's possession of the hologram generator as she made her way back to her lab. She began wondering if the hologram generator was the source of the energy waves that seemed to be correlated to her nightmare. Her assailant was using one of them when he attacked her so maybe that energy pattern triggered her nightmare. She went back through the timeline of her nightmares; they seemed to correspond to times when Dr. Malcolm would have been doing his research at the SGC.

Sam wrote up a quick report recommending General Myers and General Landry make a decision about Dr. Malcolm's assignment, since each man believed Dr. Malcolm was following a different line of research. She had no interest in getting between two Generals who would probably end up in a pissing contest but she did want that hologram generator gone, just in case it was the instigating her nightmare.

As soon as she hit send on her email she picked up her phone and dialed. She knew it was almost dinner time in Washington but she hoped she could catch Jack before he left work. She knew a call between the SGC and his office was more secure than a call between their homes. He picked up on the second ring.

"General O'Neill speaking."

"Jack, I think I figured it out." The combination of excitement and panic made the hairs on his neck rise.

"Sam? Are you ok?"

"Getting better by the moment. I think I know why the nightmare keeps coming and going."

"Seriously! Why?"

"There's a scientist here with one of those personal hologram generators. He's been doing research on it."

"That's not possible. Those were all moved here and disassembled after the assassination attempt on Kinsley."

"Not this one. He showed it to me today."

"How in the hell did he get it?"

"You brought it to him."

"Like hell."

"That's what he said. He said he had been working on it when he was stationed at the Pentagon but the project stalled and he was transferred to a team working on shields. General Myers apparently asked Dr. Malcolm to restart his hologram research not too long ago and you brought him the generator."

"I didn't knowingly bring it."

"Really?"

"Really. Those things were supposed to stay in pieces. If there's an active one floating around it happened without my knowledge."

"Do you remember bringing a Dr. Malcolm anything?"

"I shuttle classified materials between the Pentagon and SGC all the time and I don't tend to ask too many questions."

"That might be something you should change."

"That would involve listening to a bunch of geeks explain what is in the box. No thanks. I'd also like to think my people wouldn't have me transport anything so damn stupid. I will order that thing away from the SGC tonight."

"I sent a report detailing everything to General Landry. It might be best if you let him at least read it first. I don't want him to think I am going to take things straight to you all the time."

"I understand but…"

"No buts Jack. Let the channels and the process work. I'll nudge General Landry from the side and once it is brought to your attention by someone other than me feel free to go ballistic."

"Nuclear is more like it. I can't believe unsanctioned research has been plaguing you for months."

"At least we know how to end it."

"But I want it ended now."

"I can handle it for a couple more nights. I doubt it will take longer than that."

"Couldn't you just go smash it to pieces?"

Sam grinned. "I guess technically I could claim some level of oversight of the project and decide to explore the inner workings of the machine if I knew how to get into the safe."

"C4."

"I can't blow up a safe on the base."

"You are such a stickler for the rules."

"Luckily for you I'm willing to bend a few here and there."

Jack grinned. "You're sure? I'd be willing to stand up for you as long as the explosion didn't cause the mountain to implode."

"I'm sure. Knowing I'm close to having it over helps."

"Ok. Don't stay on base much longer."

She softly giggled. "I'm on my way out as soon as I hang up."

"Good. Let's talk more once we're both home. Maybe you can work out a long weekend in DC, just until that damn thing is in pieces."

"Maybe I can."


End file.
